History tells us that these things happen to empires. The Mayans disappeared. The Spanish Armada sank. Springsteen put out Devils and Dust. The Yankees, the mightiest dynasty in sports - (after the Chinese Ping-Pong team of the 1970s), have collapsed.
This is not a drill. Make your way to the exits. Women and children first. We practiced for this, people. We tracked this storm for months. That's not hail, it's baseballs dropping from the sky, launched by opposing batters. The Yankalypse is here: Tex is probably gone, nobody is coming, and once again, we are reminded that life's surest winners are youth and hunger - and we haven't seen either in a long time.
Boston and Baltimore are ahead of us, Tampa is gaining, and Toronto has won four in a row. Chien-Ming Wang pitches today for the Jays. I'm thinking this end of time should be remembered as the Ying of Wang. Everything crumbled
when we let him go.
But it was always waiting to happen. We watched it destroy Boston last year. Everyone knew we were next. They had high-priced stars doing nothing (Crawford, Gonzalez, Beckett); we have A-Rod, Grandy, Tex. et al. They had Papi playing for his contract, we have Robbie. They had Youk; we have Youk. They took a hammer to everything and started over. That's where the resemblance probably ends. We're more likely to double-down.
The Steinbrothers will have a perfect excuse to slash payroll and bank the money. Why spend so much, if you're finishing fifth?
Now, we turn back to the heroic Mr. Overbay and company. Trouble is, they did their job. They held the line until the reinforcements came. The reinforcements came. And the line has collapsed. Vernon Wells has grown old, Hafner is ice cold. Ichiro is sad to watch. You watch him and think, he's trying so hard, and he's such a shell of what he was.
Last night, I had to laugh when hearing that our top pick, Jagiello, has a strained groin and will miss the opening of the season at Staten Island. Bring him up, folks. He's ready. Or better... watch him miss the season, like our first pick last year.
Look out, below. We're coming. This is not a drill.
Sunday, June 16, 2013
Yankeetorial: Run, everybody. This is the End. The Yankalypse is here, the Ying of Wang is upon us.
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el duque
at
7:53 AM
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