Saturday, April 19, 2014

I Call For A Congressional Investigation !

I know that I did everything the same.

I sautéed up the same raw cashews in the same devil mixture.  I drank the same Crown Royal cocktails with a twist.  I used the same, store bought ice. I even wore the same clothes.

And we were "trippin."  This was one of the smoothest repeat wins we would enjoy all year.

The Yanks blasted out a four run lead and the world looked like it was under the command of the season's first JU-JU intervention.  Even my man, Solarte, started off with a solid base hit.  Our Sizemore proved that he is a major league hitter, clearing the bases with a deep double to left-center.

I poured a fresh cocktail right then and there, grabbed a handful of greasy nuts and kicked back.

Before I could veg out in ecstasy, the lead was down to two. runs  Then every relief pitcher we put in got rocked.  I mean, everyone sucked and Phellps got nailed.  Adam Warren was throwing batting practice. Dean Anna would have hit .400 against him.  It was like doubles and home runs were on sale, and the Bay Rays belly'd up to the rail.

Another dark horse of mine from spring training imploded.

 Note to local authorities: Cabral has to be removed from major league baseball.  His pitching constituted a felony in most states ( not Texas or Massachusetts ).  Either jail time or a roofing gig in Ecuador.  But no more baseball.  Please.

What I want to know is, " who blew it?"  someone, or some cadre of followers, failed to repeat, exactly, the rituals of the day before.


Consequently, I have sent a formal complaint " upstairs," and await a response.  I have even volunteered to pay Ed Snowden's expenses, and a "kicker " to Vladimir to help us uncover the truth.

I will not accept that the first JU-JU intervention of this young season was a trip to the toilet.


nicknowsky said...

Cabral was designated last night Matt Daley called up

JM said...

Why did Girardi leave Warren in? Why did he bring him back in the eighth? Why did he bring in Cabral? Who is Matt Daley? Where is Alfredo already?

Ken of Brooklyn said...

Last night was BRUTAL, with the bullpen hemorrhaging worse than freakin' Czar Nicholas II,,,, paging Dr. Aceves, DR. ACEVES!!!!

Stang said...

I blame myself. The Sammy Davis, Jr. thing killed us. It never works when I attempt Juju. I've got to find a way to quit it.

Cowgirl-Up said...

I have discovered the problem. You have been spelling your first name incorrectly, thereby violating juju rules. Get rid of the ph (this has nothing to do with chem lab!). You will see a vast improvement in the team.

Ken of Brooklyn said...

Maybe Juju should never be attempted before May, as tempting as it May be?????
And Mustang, I absolutely disagree, your the cat that won't cop out when there's danger all about,,,,,,

Alphonso said...

Hey Cowgirl,

I finally realized that last night, also. I have sent a note to Alfonso telling him he should re-file his papers to spell it my way.

Not sure I should change now, as lots of JU-JU has been effective with that version.

However, it is another arrow in the quiver when things get rough.

Also, given my " character," misspelling might just be a key component of my personality.