Thursday, August 31, 2017

Yankees are lost in the flood, and nobody is coming

There are few things less fulfilling in life than baseball's "race" for the final wild card slot. It's on the same excitement level as hearing that you've won the Publishers Clearinghouse Sweepstakes! and all you must do is, send it in, send it in! The wild card itself is about as joyful as a dry packet of instant oatmeal.

Today, after months of tantalizing their fan base, the Yankees are on the verge of plummeting back into dour mediocrity - flopping back into a pack of forgettable .500 teams, which intermittently grow hot and cold - having ditched the "Baby Bombers" rebuilding program that for the first time in years offered hope.

It's clobbering time. 

I don't know what fans can do to register their anger - legally, physically, verbally, or spiritually - but if the Yankees fall out of this race, we gotta do something. 

There has to be a way to vent our frustration. Last year, this site was the only place in the known Yankiverse to stand up for our debased Yankee values - we led the charge to moon Big Papi,a campaign for which I shall be eternally proud. If this team collapses, after all the self-congratulating, hubris-laden, chest-beating from management... well... we gotta do something.

I am open for suggestions. 

51 comments:

Parson Tom said...

if only attendance at the games would fall off the cliff, but that would probably lead to a new round of overspending on declining veterans.

Local Bargain Jerk said...


When I read El Duque's call to action, a bunch of thoughts ran through my mind, e.g., "Dress Like Randy Levine Day" at the stadium in which fans would wear orange hair, big floppy shoes, and face paint under their red noses.

Unfortunately, none of them were really grabbers or even particularly doable. Still thinking...

JM said...

That was such a miserable day, as I had feared it would be. But didn't we all?

Good news wrapped in the terrible: Green did a great job in relief. Garcia was actually good. Bird can actually hit.

Unfortunately, Sanchez can suddenly not catch this year. And Monty...what a bad day to pitch your worst game of the year.

Now we go into the Soxian meat grinder for four long, painful days.

Like Alphonso, I can't watch. We could be 9 1/2 out by Monday.

Turns out this team is what it is, not what it looked like in April and May.

Ken of Brooklyn said...

The second half of this season has been so terrifyingly terrible, I cannot fathom what the correct response would be.
JuJu yes or no???? It seems the pretense that anything we could do would reverse the downward direction of this team has all but dried up,,,, and that's the biggest shame to all of this, what a sad SAD day when I've given up hope in the great JuJu gods.

My suggestion to the management powers that be, give up the quest for the wild card, bring up all of the young guys when the roster expands, then see what they have. Then maybe, just maybe, they can make Yankee baseball FUN again,,,,,

Joe of AZ said...

MOON MANAGEMENT ALL of Them, Heck how bout FULL FRONTAL WHILE WE'RE AT IT...Coach sucks, his whole staff sucks, the GM sucks, OWner FUHGETBOUDIT.... Set Randy's hair on Fire day too.

HoraceClarke66 said...

Yes, Ken of Brooklyn is right!

My prescription for September:

—Announce that Judge has really been playing the whole time with a bad, bad, terribly awful bad shoulder injury. Don't know how he withstood the pain, but he did it for the team! Then send him home for the rest of the year, tell him to go camping and fishing, don't even think about baseball until it's time to report next February.

—Bring up McKinney, Cave, and Clint Frazier. Start them in every game through the end of the season. Restrict Gardner, Ellsbury and The Oft-Hurt Hicks to pinch-hitting, pinch-running, and late-inning defensive duty (assuming we ever have a lead again).

—Put Miguel Andujar on third for the rest of the season. Send Todd Frazier to Houston as the Yankees' designated relief representative.

—Put Garrett Cooper on first, when Bird's not playing, and DH him when he is. Send Chase Headley to North Korea as the Yankees' designated peace emissary.

Really, I'm serious about playing these guys. Time to stop even thinking about the wild card. After squandering so much of this season, we have one more month to see who can play. Let's not waste it, people!

KD said...

Trade Tanaka for a barn full of young studs. Serious about youth? Trade Tanaka now.

How pissed will I be if Tanaka is not dealt and we get another Cano situation? Seriously, time to wake up!

TRADE TANAKA NOW!!!

Anonymous said...

I LIKE YOUR PLAN HOSS....

OF COURSE, THERE IS NO CHANCE FOR IT...

REMEMBER HAL SAID IT'S A "FAILURE" IF THEY DON'T MAKE THE PLAYOFFS. (WILD CARD).

GIRARDI IS GOING TO GO BERSERK TO TRY TO DRAG US OVER THE FINISH LINE...

IT IS AMAZING HOW WE HAVE BEEN RUNNING OUT OF GAS YEAR AFTER YEAR, WITH AN OLD TEAM, AND NOW WITH A MUCH YOUNGER TEAM!

LOOK AT THE STANDINGS EL DUQUE POSTED.

MOST OF THE TEAMS ARE ON WINNING STREAKS.

EXCEPT US.

UNBELIEVABLE.

Anonymous said...

NOW FOR MY SUGGESTIONS?

MOVE BIRD TO 3RD

SANCHEZ TO CLEANUP

JUDGE TO 7TH

STOP FUCKING AROUND WITH MONTGOMERY, PITCH HIM EVERY 5TH DAY, LET HIM GO 5 INNINGS.
HE WAS IN A NICE GROOVE, TILL WE FUCKED HIM UP. ONCE AGAIN, PITCH LIMITS ARE NOT A SCIENCE!!!! (REMEMBER STRASBURG AND JOBA)...

DUMP GARCIA (MOP UP DUTY ONLY).... HE STINKS...FORGET ABOUT YESTERDAY...BULLSHIT.

GET CLINT FRAZIER IN THIS LINEUP AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE.

LESS TIME FOR AARON HICKS.

FORGET ABOUT MATT HOLLIDAY.

REPLACE MATT HOLLIDAY AS DH WITH MIGUEL ANDUJAR, AND USE HIM!

CHAPMAN NO LATER THAN THE 7TH

USE GREEN ONLY 1 INNING AGAINST GOOD TEAMS, BUT 2 INNINGS AGAINST THE LESSER ONES.

D-RO ANYTIME.....

GIRARDI LEANS ON WARREN TOO MUCH.... 1 INNING AND OUT.

KAHNLE SCARES ME AGAINST GOOD TEAMS....

DELLIN TO CLOSE.

DON'T PLAY HEADLEY AT 3RD ANYMORE.... HIS WILD THROWS ARE JUST WAITING TO HAPPEN.

THAT'S ABOUT IT....

LET YOU KNOW WHEN MORE IDEAS COME.

Ken of Brooklyn said...

ALLCAPS and HoraceClark66, your RIGHT RIGHT RIGHT!!!!!

JM said...

And just in....Yankees acquire Erik Kratz. Oh, boy.

From Newsday:

In preparation for upcoming suspensions for both Gary Sanchez and Austin Romine, the Yankees have acquired minor-league catcher Erik Kratz from the Cleveland Indians for cash considerations.

The team announced the move on Thursday.

Sanchez and Romine were suspended for four and two games, respectively, for their involvement in the benches-clearing brawl during last Thursday’s game against the Tigers. Both appealed the suspensions and are waiting for a decision.

The Yankees open a four-game set against the Red Sox on Thursday at Yankee Stadium and could be without both of their catchers.

Kratz slashed .270/.359/.472 with 13 home runs, 37 RBIs and 38 runs in 86 games with Triple-A Columbus this season.
The 37-year-old has played in 225 major-league games over seven seasons. Most recently, he played with the Pittsburgh Pirates last July.

The Yankees haven’t added Kratz to the 40-man roster, so they would have to make another move to create a spot for him.

13bit said...

Kill the beast at the head. Ditch Cashman, Ditch Joey Binders, Ditch Randy Levin, Ditch Lonn Trost. Let Gene Michael come back and direct all baseball operations. Tell Hal to check back in a few years but, in the meantime, to stay away and keep sucking his thumb.

Anonymous said...

Gene Michael? He has been advising Cashman and abetting all his stupidity. It wasn't Michael who built those Yankee dynasties of the nineties--it was Showalter; in fact, Michael was too dumb to have recognized Showalter's talent and instead recommended another mediocrity, Hal Lanier, for the managerial post that was then opening. It was only thanks to the brief invterval of sanity that prevailed under the stewardship of Robert Nederlander (during Steinbrenner's banishment) that led to the hiring of Showalter--the Showalter who most defiantly insisted on sticking with Bernie Williams and Derek Jeter when the Steinbrenner-era hacks were ready to put them on the back burner (Jeter's case) or trade them for nothing (Bernie's case). Michael was always a dumbass timeserver and Steinbrenner flunky--he was then, and still is. The problem is that the Yankee organization is run like a Mafia social club--loyalty trumps competence. Nothing will change until the team is sold.

joe de pastry said...

they are 32-39 since the great start.
yesterday was to be expected.
i'll still semi-watch with the sound off and the times in front of me.
but I have no desire to seem them be a wild card team, which they won't be anyway.

HoraceClarke66 said...

I'd put Michael in the Hall of Fame. Far from being a "dumb-ass time server" he did amazing work in building that 1990s team. No, he didn't do it alone...but it wasn't all the doing of Showalter, either.

Read sometime what Reggie Jackson has said about how much Michael helped him in preparing for the three-home run game in 1977, or the general scouting advice he'd give. The guy knows the game.

And you're wrong about Jeter and Michael. Read Jeter's bio; Michael was in the room fighting hard for him, and it was he who prevailed. It was the idiot, Clyde King, who wanted to send him back, then trade Mo for Felix Fermin.

For that matter, it was Michael who constantly stood up to Steinbrenner when he wanted to get rid of young guys, insisting he would tell the press that such trades were George's idea. Steinbrenner wouldn't risk such exposure.

When the Yanks lost that 5th game in Seattle in 1995—a game, incidentally, where the genius Showalter let Cone, with over 140 pitches under his belt, walk Doug Strange to force in the tying game because he didn't trust Mariano to get the out—George had his excuse to demote Michael and fire or banish much of his staff. A travesty—but again, shows that Michael was far from some toady.

Anonymous said...

HoraceClarke66--Oh sure--we'll credit those three Jackson homeruns to Gene Michael. That's the most preposterous thing I ever heard. Michael was a thin reed of subservience to Steinbrenner before Showalter came on the scene. It was Buck who demonstrated that the Boss and his minions could be resisted to the benefit of the team, and that the time was ripe for building with young talent. Bernie has always said that it was buck who saved his career with the Yankees.

Moreover, your post is devoid of logic. One on-field misjudgment by Showalter does not negate the enormous influence he had in galvanizing the brain-dead subculture of the Yankee front office. If Showalter hadn't been there, the team never would have sniffed the playoffs that year or in the ensuing years. And if Michael had had his way, the skipper for those pivotal years would have been Hal Lanier.

Cashman says that one of the main lessons he learned from Michael was "sifting"--in essence, the dumpster diving that has yielded one washed-up dead weight after another during his regime--guys who were good or were supposed to be good five years ago, like Headley and Todd Frazier ad nauseam. Michael has been in the war room for all these transactions as the eminence grise of the dumbass Yankee front office. He's a member in good standing of the Steinbrenner mafia--as is Cashman. Until that mafia sells the team, you can forget about any youth movement for this team.

Anonymous said...

Boys, boys, relax... George Michael did a good job running the banana stand. He was conscientious and most importantly really cared about the business. Sure eventually he burned it down but even then he was just trying to do the right thing. I blame Gob.

Doug K.

Moeteef said...

Andujar, Cave, McKinney, Bird, Frazier. The old guys riding pine when the rosters expand. What's not to get?

I'm Bill White said...

I took your request for suggestions to mean protest ideas. I would suggest a continuous video loop at the top of the blog of the great sea of plush blue seats behind home plate. Or a more restrained shot of one blue seat, zooming in or panning out. Whatever suits your fancy.

Leinstery said...

Why bother with these losers?

Parson Tom said...

Does Bob Watson get no credit for the 1990s dynasty? Certainly, Steinbrenner's suspension played a major role in allowing the organization to cultivate and retain young talent. Gene Michael, Buck Showalter, watson? Good job, men. We salute you!

Parson Tom said...

Bird is the word.

Alphonso said...

Soccer is better.

Parson Tom said...

Betances gives me agita.

Anonymous said...

SAYING GENE MICHAEL IS A "DUMB-ASS" IS RIDICULOUS.

GET YOUR FACTS STRAIGHT BUDDY....

MICHAEL IS 79 NOW, AND A PART TIME, ON THE ROAD SCOUT.

HE IS NOT SITTING IN ON THESE CASHMAN DEALS.

Anonymous said...

LATE NIGHT NEWS RUMOR GUYS....

MIGUEL ANDUJAR IS NOT COMING UP TO THE BIG TEAM TOMORROW!

WHY WOULD HE?

HE CAN HIT!

MATT HOLLIDAY (.200 IN THE MINORS OVER 35 AT BATS) WILL FIT IN PERFECT....

UNBELIEVABLE.

HoraceClarke66 said...

Anonymous—don't take my word for it. Read what Reggie has to say about it, in "Becoming Mr. October."

No, Michael didn't do it alone. Buck helped, and as Tom says, Bob Watson contributed. Read Golenbock's bio of Steinbrenner. He's got all these front office insiders talking about the job Michael did, along with his whole team.

Read Ian O'Connor's bio of Jeter. He confirms the role Michael played in keeping him on the team.

Or just read the record: Michael taught Cashman dumpster diving? Huh, well, in the 1990s the vets we got were the likes of Paul O'Neill, David Cone, Jimmy Key, Darryl Strawberry, Doc Gooden, Tim Raines, Chili Davis, Scott Brosius.

No Pronk, no Vernon, no Todd Frazier. If Michael taught Cashman how to sift, he forgot a few lessons.

I will say it was unfair of me to bring up Buck's blowing that Seattle game, though I remember at the time trying to physically thrust my hands through the screen to get at his throat.

Showalter was a very good manager, who deserved better from the Steinbrenners. Michael was a top executive and judge of talent who also deserved better. Dysfunction on this team starts at the top.

Anonymous said...

Hey All Caps--get your finger off the caps lock key long enough to read a newspaper. Cashman has repeatedly said, in print and on-air interviews, that Gene Michael is in the trade "War Room" giving advice every time one of these shitty deals is hatched and closed.

And while you're at it, read a book on baseball analysis. When it comes to dumbasses, you far surpass Gene Michael. You're in a class by yourself. TAKE THAT, DUMBASS!!!!! READ A BOOK AND FIND OUT WHY BATTING ORDER IS NOT AS IMPORTANT AS YOU THINK IT IS!!! READ A BOOK AND FIND OUT WHY "PROTECTION" IN THE BATTING ORDER IS A MYTH!!!! READ A BOOK AND FIND OUT WHY SHAKESPEARE IS A GENIUS!!! READ A BOOK AND FIND OUT WHY THE HUMAN RACE MIGHT HAVE ONLY A HUNDRED OR SO YEARS LEFT ON THIS PLANET!!!!! READ ANY BOOK!!!! GET A LIFE!!!! GET LAID!!!! BUT ABOVE ALL, GET THE HELL OFF THIS BLOG SO ANYONE WITH A BRAIN DOESN'T HAVE TO FEEL EMBARRASSED ABOUT TURNING TO THE COMMENT SECTION!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

HoraceClarke66--go ahead and nominate Gene Michael for the Nobel Peace Prize if you must, but you miss the point that Michael was always a spineless factotum for Steinbrenner with no baseball imagination who was prodded to turn in the right direction only by the assertive presence of Buck Showalter, who was aggressive in pressing his views about player preferences and draft choices. And in fact Showalter would never have become the Yankees' manager if Nederlander had not overruled Michael's predictably brainless choice of Hal Lanier.

Brosius had two good years for the Yankees but was otherwise a mediocre, overrated player who typical WAR was in the zero range or close to it. Gooden was terrible in his two main years with the Yankees, with an ERA of around 5 and a pitcher's WAR in negative territory. Showalter was opposed to the acquisition of Strawberry, whose WAR with the team always hovered around zero (he reached 1.5 in 1998--that was his PEAK with the Yankees). Same with Davis and Raines, whose combined average annual WAR with the team was less than one. In fact, it was Cashman--with Michael's blessing--who got rid of Mike Lowell in favor of re-signing a fading Brosius--one of the crasser blunders of the Cashman-Michael axis, but a typical one.These acquisitions and decisions foreshadowed Cashman's Michael-inspired penchant for acquiring washed-up big names and squadering young talent rather than concentrating on player development. That's the reason that, once the Big Five of the Showalter Era faded from the scene, Cashman has been unable to build a powerful, dynastic Yankee team--he knuckles under to the Yankee mafia's predilection for guys who made the All-Star team five years ago. And Michael is the continuing power behind the throne who guides Cashman in these follies.

Parson Tom said...

anon -- and on again:

You bring up some interesting points and topics. It's a shame that you are unpleasant in how you do so.

A few reactions:
The difference between the dumpster diving of this decade and the veteran acquisitions of the '90s was how the players were deployed. For instance, Overbay, Pronk and Berkman were plugged in as every day players while Strawberry, Raines and others who were good players at the end of their careers were used in favorable situations -- as I recall it.

I do not fight the truth of advanced statistics, but I don't embrace them without reservation, either. You attempt to diminish Strawberry's contributions with his overall WAR, but I can point to several games that he turned around with three-run bombs. He was a potent weapon in the lineup or off the bench, and after he went away David Justice did a remarkable job in a similar role. Of course, not all of these things worked out, but the Yankees had a nice run of it back when they weren't penalized for outspending the rest of the league.

The Brosius-Lowell decisions worked out poorly -- terribly -- as management invested in current returns rather than long-term assets. That has been one of the huge issues for the Yankees for nearly 40 years. Giving all the credit for a dynasty team to one member of the management team is silly, especially if you want to heap so much praise and credit for the 1996-2000 run on a field manager who was gone after the 1995 season. Many key moves were made after Showalter was dispatched. And he was an insufferable boor, as shown by the fact that two teams won world series the year after he left. (Hey, you're not Buck Showalter, are you? Posting comments late at night after another Baltimore bullpen meltdown?) Currently, Cashman deserves individual scrutiny -- along with Girardi -- because they have presided over nearly a decade of an also-ran, with a disturbing tendency to look like world beaters early in the season but old and tired at the end, as CAPS has noted.

As for the lineup and Judge's place in it, we've all read articles stating that lineup orders don't matter, but you ignore two key points:
1. The sabremetricians do acknowledge that the guys at the top of the order get more at bats. Judge belongs at the bottom of the order because he is less productive.
2. Less tangibly but still meaningful (according to me): The guys at the top of the order know that they are supposed to perform, that they are under a microscope and that they have more opportunities to impact the game. Clearly, Judge has been uncomfortable and under pressure. Batting him 2nd, 3rd and 4th while he's striking out 50 percent of the time cannot be helping him emotionally. Yes, statistics tell the truth about performance, but there certainly is a human element to management and performance. Plugging the kid into the 3rd spot every day for 9 weeks while he was batting about .150 and striking out at a record pace was a rigidly dumb thing for Girardi to do.

Finally, we are all Yankee fans here. You seem to have a lot of information and perspectives that I would enjoy reading, especially if you could manage to not be an asshole in how you state your case.


Urban Farmer formerly known as DutchFan said...

When the going gets tough, the tough take a break and travel to Rotterdam for Heineken, vlammetjes and bitterballen. And a hideaway far from Evil Empires.

Consider yourself invited. You need the break

Anonymous said...

HEY anonymous....

I DON'T HAVE TO READ A BOOK...

I WATCH THE GAMES!

I'm Bill White said...

I'm mildly disappointed that the Blue Seat suggestion has gotten lost in the shuffle here. We need our best engineers on it.

Anonymous said...

.......AND IF YOU'RE INTO READING SO MUCH, TRY READING THE ARTICLES THAT SAY IT IS TIM NAEHRING THAT CASHMAN HAS BEEN COLLABORATING WITH.

......AND THE ARTICLE THAT READS, " GENE MICHAEL'S PATIENCE WITH DEREK JETER AND NUCLEUS OF YOUNG PLAYERS PAVED THE WAY FOR A CHAMPIONSHIP ERA."

LIKE I SAID BEFORE anonymous,

GET YOUR FACTS STRAIGHT.

HoraceClarke66 said...

I think I can settle this whole kerfuffle.

Tom, a brilliant defense. And I had the same thought: Anonymous is obsessed with this issue, and claims to have a lot of inside info: IS HE REALLY BUCK "ANONYMOUS" SHOWALTER?

But rather than dispute, point by point, all the acquisitions mentioned and who was responsible for them, I thought I'd call on the one guy—other than Buck Showalter—who Anonymous feels really saved the Yankees: ROBERT NEDERLANDER.

The thing is, Anonymous: you're right.

Michael DID want to hire "someone with major-league managerial experience" instead of Showalter. He admitted as much at the time. You can read it here, from the UPI, 10/29/91:

http://www.upi.com/Archives/1991/10/29/Showalter-named-Yankees-manager/8447688712400/

But you know what ELSE is here? This assessment from ROBERT NEDERLANDER, of Gene Michael:

"'I TRULY BELIEVER THAT GENE MICHAEL IS THE BEST BASEBALL MAN IN THE ENTIRE COUNTRY TODAY,' NEDERLANDER SAID."

There you have it, Anonymous Buck. ROBERT NEDERLANDER, the (other) guy YOU credit with saving the Yankees and building the last dynasty, said that GENE MICHAEL was the best baseball man in the country.

Case closed, I think.

Anonymous said...

HoraceClarke66 -- You think because Nederlander made the right--and pivotal--decision about hiring Showalter that his every utterance on every subject is then necessarily right? Which elementary logic class did you flunk out of? ONe thing we know for sure--almost nothing that you write is right--and that's just an empirical statement, not a logical inference from Mortimer Snerd's Book of Syllogisms.

And I'm glad that you ratify my assertion that Michael preferred an incompetent with mangaerial experience, just as he and Cashman have always preferred incompetent players with major league experience over developing homegrown talent--to the fatal detriment of this franchise after Showalter's youth movement got old and retired.

Please keep verifying all my key points for me--it saves me time. Thanks again!

Anonymous said...

HEY ALL CAPS--IF I REPRODUCE THE LINK OF THE AUDIO OF CASHMAN'S INTERVIEW WITH MIKE FRANCESA WHERE HE SAYS THAT MICHAEL WAS IN THE WAR ROOM CONSULTING ON ALL THE RECENT MAJOR YANKEE TRADES, WILL YOU PROMISE NEVER TO POST ON THIS BLOG AGAIN?

Anonymous said...

Dear Parson Tom--always good to get a sermon on blog decorum from someone who calls people assholes. In other words, do as you say, not as you do. Right, parson?

Anonymous said...

Parson Tom--your comments are incoherent. I didn't give Showalter credit for managing the Yankees from 1996-2001. I have him credit for pressing for the shift in orientation that emphasized developing young talent as opposed to trading for fading big names and guys who were supposed to be good five years earlier. Clear enough?

As for your tortured logic about Judge--he is, based on the years's averages, by far the best hitter on the team. He has hit a prolonged dry spell either because of an undisclosed injury or because of a psychological ripple that he needs to work out. Demoting your most potent hitter to the bottom of the lineup is a sure recipe for accelerated team misfortune. He's already picked up the pace in the last few games. The way to develop young talent is to PLAY the young talent through ups and downs, not to shunt them to the margins in panic every time they slump at the plate. Did you check out Bernie Williams' offensive stats in his first year with the Yankees? There are countless other such examples from the Yankees and other teams. The smart people recognize the talent and nurture it. The Steinbrenners of the world and their lackeys disdain the young talent and quest--time after futile time--after overpriced underperforming "names." Wait . . . are you sure you're not the Ghost of the Fat Man himself, haunting this blog with your fractured logic and hotheaded impatience and overall baseball illiteracy? Nah--can't be!

Anonymous said...

SORRY DOUCHEBAG anonymous.....

LET ME SCHOOL YOU....

GENE MICHAEL IS ALMOST 80 YEARS OLD.

EVEN THOUGH CASHMAN SAYS "GENE MICHAEL IS IN THE WAR ROOM ON THESE DECISIONS", IT DOES NOT MEAN HE IS SITTING THERE ON ANY OF THE DEALS!

IN OTHER WORDS, IT IS A RESPECTFUL WAY FOR CASHMAN TO PRAISE MICHAEL, AND HIS DECADES WITH THE TEAM, AS HE STILL IS ON THE YANKEE PAYROLL...... BUT AS I HAVE SAID BEFORE, MICHAEL HAS TAKEN A BACK SEAT AND IS NOW MOSTLY A LOW LEVEL MINOR LEAGUE SCOUT, WHICH HE LOVES DOING.

GET IT?

QUESTIONS?

STILL THINK MICHAEL IS A DOPE?

DOPE.

Anonymous said...

HEY ALL CAPS--WHAT DO YOU PLAN TO DO ABOUT YOUR TWO MAIN PROBLEMS? TO WIT:

A. TERMINAL ANGER MANAGEMENT: ONLY CHRONICALLY ENRAGED AND FRUSTRATED PEOPLE TYPE ALL THEIR POSTS IN ALL CAPS.
B. INVETERATE STUPIDITY: CASHMAN SAID IN THE INTERVIEW THAT MICHAEL WAS THERE IN THE WAR ROOM TO GIVE HIS ADVICE ON ALL THE TRADES. BUT YOU, OF COURSE, WHO WEREN'T THERE, WHO HAVE NEVER MADE A MORE IMPORTANT DECISION IN YOUR LIFE THAN WHICH HAND TO WIPE YOUR ASS WITH, KNOW MORE ABOUT THIS THAN CASHMAN. QUEL IDIOT!
C. GENE MICHAEL'S OFFICIAL TITLE--AND HIS OFFICIAL DUTIES--ARE SENIOR VICE PRESIDENT AND SENIOR ADVISOR. HE IS NOT A MINOR LEAGUE SCOUT UNLESS DESIGNATED ON A SPOT BASIS FOR SPECIAL ASSIGNMENTS. SO YOU JUST PULLED THAT ONE OUT OF YOUR FAT ASS, PERHAPS GROPING IN THEIR FOR SOME REMNANT OF YOUR BRAIN STEM.

YOU'RE AN IGNORAMUS, A HUFFING BLOWHARD, A BULLSHIT ARTIST WHO GETS NEARLY EVERY FACT WRONG, A HOT-AIR MACHINE OF EVERY RECEIVED, BRAIN-DEAD DISCREDITED BASEBALL CLICHE KNOWN TO THGE LOWER ECHELONS OF THE BASEBALL BLOGOSPHERE. YOU WATCH EVERY GAME, DO YOU? WELL SO DO CASHMAN AND GIRARDI, AND YOU WANT THEM FIRED, RIGHT? SO SOMETHING MORE THAN WATCHING EVERY GAME IS REQUIRED TO COMMENT INSIGHTFULLY ON BASEBALL, JUST AS SOMETHING MORE THAN WATCHING AN APPLE FALL FROM A TREE IS REQUIRED TO ACHIEVE ANY INSIGHT INTO ADVANCED PHYSICS.

YOU'RE A CRUDE DUFUS AND AN EMBARRASSMENT TO THIS BLOG. GO AWAY.

Anonymous said...

HEY DOUCHEBAG....

I'M GONNA MAKE THIS REAL EASY FOR YOU....

JUST WATCH THE LATEST GENE MICHAEL "YANKEEOGRAPHY".

...... CASE CLOSED.

BOOM!

HoraceClarke66 said...

Dear Anonymous Buck Showalter:

Please address any and all further comments regarding Gene Michael's abilities to Robert Nederlander.

Meanwhile, speaking of logic, I admire how adamantly you have ignored every single source cited by myself, ALL-CAPS, Tom, and everyone else here.

Always remember: facts that refute your point of view aren't really facts! They're just a vile conspiracy by nasty people to upset you.

Anonymous said...

DOUBLE BOOM DOUCHEBAG!!!!

Parson Tom said...

But I like the name he gave me.

Local Bargain Jerk said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Local Bargain Jerk said...

Parson Tom: Your reply is fantastic. LOL.

Anonymous said...

HoraceClarke66--I answered every one of your points. You chide me for not addressing your specifics, but then you fail to cite which ones. That's bullshit. I addressed your logic-challenged sally about Nederlander's comment. Anything pertaining to logic flies right over your flat head. Why don't you trade love notes with ALL CAPS, someone who is closer to your overall level of intelligence and illiteracy. Nietzsche called this the comfort of the herd animal.

Anonymous said...

HEY ALL CRAPS--YOU SERIOUSLY CITE THE AL-YANKEEZEERA NETWORK AS A RELIABLE SOURCE OF INFORMATION? WHAT'S YOUR FAVORITE SONG--THAT DITTY FROM "THE WIZARD OF OZ," "IF I ONLY HAD A BRAIN." OF COURSE! HAVE YOU LOOKED UP THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN "INFER" AND "IMPLY" YET GENIUS? OH SORRY--THAT WOULD REQUIRE DOING SOME READING. YOU'RE TOO BUSY OILING YOUR FUCKING CAPS KEY TO BOTHER WITH SUCH NICETIES. DON'T DRIBBLE ON YOUR MOMMY'S BASEMENT LINOLEUM.

Anonymous said...

Parson Tom--you're far too modest. You should adopt as your moniker the epithet you spew so freely at anyone who isn't neck-deep like you in the muck of a hundred years of accumulated baseball stupidity: namely, "asshole." Yes, it fits you much better than Parson Tom, and requires less typing.

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