Look who is at the bottom of the AL East

 

When it comes to old-fashioned, flame-roasted, Putin-grade, bull-goose hatred of the Yankees, nobody - I mean nobody - beats the Tampa Devil Rays. 

I know, I know... Redsock fans think their hatred of us throbs like Ben Affleck's heart at a J-Lo show, but ever since the Curse of the Bambino turned into A-Rod's forgotten past,  Boston fans don't crackle with the usual, self-righteous bile. They have more rings than we do, and deep down inside, they know that they have become us. Meanwhile, the Rays fan remains a treacherous and malignant cave dweller - a mix of Gollum and Florida Man, who hates the Yankees because: 

1. We our hold our spring training in their back yard.

2. We broadcast our games into their media space.

3. They must play games in a giant ping pong ball.

4. For most of the summer, it's just too hot to watch baseball. 

The Rays have still never won a world series, Evan Longoria is in his fifth year with the San Francisco Giants, their city's most famous sports icon plays quarterback and - for reasons that probably extend back to Ponce de Leon - their fans blame the Yankees. 

Well, okay... so be it. If hating the Yankees gives you definition, have at it. But when your personally selected rival falls into a funk, as the Yankees did in the month of April, what happens? This was a perfect time for Tampa to put space between themselves and the Yankees, to take command of the AL East. And they've blown it. 

Today, let's simply note that Tampa, which took four out of five from the Yankees, cannot seem to beat anybody else. They're 0-3 against Boston, 1-2 against Toronto. If you delete the Yankee games, Tampa would be 8-14, leading only the Twins and Tigers. 

Imagine how frustrating it must be: sweep the Yanks, then lose three out of four to Texas. 

Today, the Yankees face baseball's worst team. Beat Detroit, and we reach .500, with the days growing longer, the virus diminishing and the weather improving. But down in the Sunshine State, the Rays can't seem to climb out of their sinkhole. It's just getting hotter, with those African pythons slithering around, the local Hooters running out of chicken wings, and hurricane season just around the bend.

This isn't to crow over their misfortune. The Rays have yet to play Baltimore or Detroit, dominoes to be pushed over. They will get hot. They remain the team to beat. But while we lament the troublesome month of April, take a look at who is below us in the standings. This was the Rays' big chance. Thus far, they've botched it.