Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Yankeetorial: Is Cervelli our Bacon or our Leyritz?

Poor John Lackey. He must have grown up in that "Footloose" town that bans dancing. After a batter homers, Lackey wants him to march respectfully to the dugout, recite a psalm from the good book and celebrate with a splash of water and a sunflower seed. Thus, last night, he had no choice but to cast his stone at the repentant head of the demon, Frankie Cervelli, our Yankee Kevin Bacon.

Yep, he threw at Cervelli's head. The YES team ragged on tonelessly about Cervelli's hand clap at home, but nobody mentioned that Osama bin Lackey threw at the guy's head.

Well, screw them, and screw Lackey. We always get a Cervelli adrenal boost. That's how he plays: Run hard, yell hard, clap. With runners on, he elevates his game. He's made a career as pet catcher for certain pitchers. And he gets big hits.

Today, at River Ave, they note how Cervelli's three career HRs have each been historic - "His 2009 shot in Atlanta was basically the turning point of that season, and his grand slam in Texas earlier this year helped end an offensive malaise and a rather sizable losing skid."  On a team that sometime scores 22, it's amazing to think that Cervelli never homered in a blowout. His career numbers may be low. They're sure not padded.  

Which reminds me of Jim Leyritz, the wiseass who hit great homeruns during the early Torre years, now sadly remembered for his DWI and being organizationally shunned. Both caught. Both seemed snake-bitten. (Cervelli lost a year when a Tampa meatball  coldcocked him during an exhibition game. Leyritz screwed up the ball in LF that lost Andy Hawkins' no-hitter.) Both knew more talented players were out there. They just hustled harder.

So next year, we have a delimna. Jesus Montero is coming. Russel Martin deserves to stay. Austin Romine will knock on the door, with Gary Sanchez ever rising. We have a system full of young catchers. But only one deserves to be the fulltime backup.

It's been tough enough watching Ace Aceves pitch for Boston. God helps us if they ever get Cervelli. Yeesh. They might as well have Kevin Bacon.


David Ballela said...

I think Lackey was upset from the start because he heard that Qaddafi had a similar Condoleezza album to his.

Big Papi said...

I wasn't, because I only like white women.

CC said...

Shut up, because you're getting plunked next time I pitch as retaliation for Cervelli

Joe De Pastry said...

Cervelli is an ass.
If he was a red suck and acted that way we'd justifiably hate him for it.
But we still got to retaliate because he is our ass [for the rest of this year only I hope.]