Thursday, December 28, 2017

Let's Help Out Mr. Cashman

Your good friend and mine, Randy Levine was quoted in yesterday's New York Post as saying:

I know Cashman is upstairs working, not finished. We’re hopeful there’s more stuff to be done before spring training and Opening Day.
Well, ok then.

El Duque's post this morning reminiscing (in a night sweats sort of way) about the trade that brought us Rick Rhoden got me to thinking about ways concerned Yankee fans everywhere could put a stop to any "more stuff to be done".

There was a sign in the original Yankee Stadium with a 1949 quote from the legendary Joe Dimaggio:

The sign was hung in the tunnel connecting the Yankees' clubhouse to the dugout.  There are several pictures of Yankees reaching up and touching the sign for inspiration before trotting out to the field.

I propose that the Yanks hang a similar sign from the ceiling in the hallway that connects Yankee senior management offices to the rest of the stadium.  Hal, Randy, and Brian could all make a nice tradition of reaching up and touching it for inspiration.

Here's my proposed sign:

If Steiner collectibles marketed a signed picture of each of them taking a sprightly step up and fist-bumping the logo on the right, I would buy one of each, even Randy Levine's.

There have to be other ideas to make our management team stand pat this winter and play youth this spring. Let's bat this around.


HoraceClarke66 said...

We just need to add:

Willie McGee=Bob Sykes

Fred McGriff=Dale Murray

Alphonso said...

Great idea LBJ.

HoraceClarke66 said...

Also, signing whoever the hell it was that cost us the draft pick that became Tim Belcher.

el duque said...

This is wonderful.

Anonymous said...

My solutions

Randy Levine

We create a viral campaign (a Sid Finch type story) about a player in, let’s say, Pago Pago who can throw a 128 MPH change up, can hit a baseball so hard he once drove it out of Pago, across the water and all the way to the other Pago, plus he will work for coconut shells.

As part of the story we let it be known that he will only talk to Randy Levine. As Pago Pago can only be reached by Chinese Merchant Marine ships Randy will be out of the picture until after the midseason trade deadline.

Brian Cashman

This one is a little harder… We will need him at some point. It does no good to remind him of past failures. A GM is only as good as his most recent trades and the last one was pretty damn good. So how do we get him to step away from the table?

Using our massive media influence one of us calls up Joel Sherman and convinces him to write that the Dodgers want to trade Kershaw for Clint Frazier straight up but they’re waiting for some medical test to come back from, dare I say it? Pago Pago Laboratories to make sure Kershaw is healthy. The results will be in any day now, but Cashman can't trade Frazier in the interim because whatever team he trades Red Thunder to will of course, flip him for Kershaw.

Hal Steinbrenner

We simply remind him that any additional players will cost money.

Doug K.

HoraceClarke66 said...

Brilliant, Doug K.! Just brilliant!

Now, if there were only some way to convince the Red Sox they absolutely have to have Gerrit Cole...

13bit said...

We know it's coming, so let's just bend over and take it like men. We know it's coming. BOHICA.

CRACKHEAD CASH just cannot help himself. ALL WE HAVE TO DO IS STAND PAT. No trading of good prospects. No clogging of the path to glory for our young studs in Scranton. No soul murder of the boys in double and single A when they see that they are just fodder for the tree chipper. Just do nothing.

Let me tell you one thing i have learned in this life, though.

Doing nothing is sometimes the hardest thing to do.

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