Wednesday, April 1, 2015

ICYMI, here's the recap: David Ortiz misquotes himself, is caught lying, blames the Yankees (and ESPN blames ARod)



OK, here's the quick run-through.

David Ortiz pens an essay in Derek Jeter's "The Players' Tribune": (Read it here, but have a barf bag handy)

The Subway Squawkers blog calls bullshit: (Read it here)

Dan Shaughnessy calls bullshit: (Read it here)

Boston.com calls bullshit: (Read it here)

Craig Calcaterra calls bullshit, and says Ortiz' article is basically an unknowing admission of past drug use (if not steroids, then amphetamines): Read it here

ESPN calls .... Ortiz a great guy and a wonderful teammate and a fantastic human being and says his family is hurt by these allegations! Seriously, every word Ortiz said in TPT is taken as gospel, and Ortiz is the real victim in this whole thing because the 2003 test results were supposed to remain anonymous! (Read it here, and grab another barf bag).

David Ortiz says that he was misquoted ... in the article that he supposedly wrote himself. Yep, he misquoted himself: (Read it here)

David Ortiz blames the a New York conspiracy for the release of his failed drug test, hinting that the Yankees were behind the leak: (Read it here)

Subway Squawkers calls more bullshit: (Read it here)

ESPN notes that David Ortiz has passed dozens of drug tests, but that unfortunately, Ortiz is being naive to think that could be taken as proof of his innocence. Why? Because of Alex Rodriguez, who also allegedly passed dozens of drug tests but is unquestionably and undeniably one of the two biggest drug cheats in the history of sports. Really: (Read it here)

And finally, Peter Gammons ... says nothing. Nada. Zilch. Not on Twitter. Not on his website. He does, however, tweet out that Alex Rodriguez seems to be "feeling the power" this spring. (Wink wink! Nod nod!)

7 comments:

KD said...

that graphic made me do a spit-take. Thank you the great post!

and let me be the first to give a tip-o-the-cap to our old Captain, Mr. Jeets. He set up that entire Player's Tribune website just to trap that fat fuck. If he hadn't, surely he would have warned off such an ill-advised post. Dude shot himself in the foot. Totally a self-inflicted wound born of hubris.

Our Captain. Still fighting the good fight, on the side of the truth and justice. Still a Yankee!!

Stang said...

Nicely done, Bern. It's always fun to see what Papi will pity himself for next.

el duque said...

We need a revolution. And I am typing this within a short drive of the Karl Marx House!

manx said...

http://www.rollingstone.com/culture/features/scott-ians-2015-new-york-yankees-preview-theyre-going-to-suck-20150401

el duque said...

We got Petit from Houston! Who said Hal was cheap?

(Workers unite! You have nothing to lose but the AL wild card.)

JM said...

Big Poopi looks like e stepped in it.

Parson Tom said...

This is reminiscent of another another great moment in literature: When Charles Barkley's autobiography was released and he, too, was misquoted.

This stuff on Big Papi is delicious!