A sorry day in America: Some words the Astros ought to summon

Testing, one, two, three... Um... Thank you for coming today. My remarks will be brief, and I will not take questions, though I promise to be available in the future.

I want to apologize to the game of baseball. 

I'm not going to discuss the details of this scandal. I won't say whether some of us cheated, and some of us didn't. Every coach, player and team official who knew what was happening is responsible. It's that simple. The Houston Astros have undermined the game of baseball, and in our careers, and in our lives, this will never be forgotten. We may never regain the respect that we have squandered. That's on us. That's on me.

I want to apologize to all opposing players.

Specifically, I want to address all the pitchers who suffered at our hands without even knowing why. You didn't deserve to be humbled or humiliated, at times on national TV. You didn't deserve the hook, or the boos, or in some cases, to be sent back to the minors because our batters knew what pitch was coming. In the fog of our ambition, we stole from you and your families. If I could turn back the clock, I would. 

I want to apologize to the fans.

Especially, I want to address all those around Houston who believed in us, who rallied behind us, and who now must try to explain to their sons and daughters how we failed you. We wanted so desperately to bring you a championship, a celebration, a time of joy and accomplishment. We wanted it so badly that we became blinded to what is right and wrong. If I could turn back the clock, I would.

I want to apologize to America. 

Today, I see a country that is losing faith in its own democracy. We are heading toward a presidential election whose outcome neither side may accept. This is because of people who put wealth over honor, and put power over truth. It has been said that baseball is a metaphor for life. Well, what we did was taint the results of entire seasons - and the World Series, itself. It will take many years for restore trust in such institutions. If I could turn back the clock, I would.

But, as we all know, we can't go back. All I can say... to the game, to the players, to the fans and to America... is this: 

Please do not give up. As painful as these revelations have been, the truth is always preferable than a history propped up by lies. We always need to know what is happening. Never imagine that a covered-up a scandal is better than an exposed one. Never blame those brave souls who come forward to tell the truth. Some players blame Mike Fiers for speaking out. He is a hero, like all whistleblowers.

Thus, today, I am donating my entire 2017 World Series share to the IT IS HIGH, IT IS FAR, IT IS caught Yankee fan blog, the lone voice of truth and dignity in the baseball universe. I urge all my current and former teammates to do the same. Only through righteous voices, such as this beacon of truth, can the national pastime be restored to its sacred, honorable status.

I thank you for your attention. I will now go out to the parking lot and sign autographs until every single fan is gone. It's what I will do tomorrow, and the day after, and the day after that. It's my new normal. I can't wait.