Tuesday, February 18, 2020

Astro Vespers

With apologies to A. A. Milne  

Little boy settles in over the plate,   
Crosses himself, crouches and waits,
Hush hush, stay quiet this time!
Jose Altuve is getting his sign.

God bless my Astros, all are great mates
To tell me what to expect at the plate.
God bless Coach Cora, and Carlos Beltran,
And God bless Gatorade for supplying the can.

Tapping the bat on the side of his cleats,
Adjusting his cup, his collar, his teats,
Hush hush, don't say a word!
Jose Altuve's expecting a curve.

It's such wonderful tech that allows us to see
What the next pitch is likely to be.
God bless those geeks, whoever they be,
Of course, most of all, God bless me.

Little boy lines up the ball in his sight,
Little boy swings with all of his might!
To his reps please direct your inquiries--
Jose Altuve helped steal a World Series. 


Platoni said...

I'm imagining this sung by the Beastie Boys. Perfect

el duque said...


HoraceClarke66 said...


Beauregard Jackson Pickett Burnside said...

Very cute. Like t-ball. Which sorta the game the Astros were playing cuz they knew where the ball was gonna be.

TheWinWarblist said...

Plantoni, I wish they were around to sing it.

RichieAllen1964 said...

I wonder if Man-Freddo knows that the World Series trophy is called the “Commissioner's Trophy.”

I’d be willing to bet he discovered this little tidbit after opened his trap. And long after handing out five of them. He makes me yearn for the unvarnished stupidity of Bowie Kuhn.

And speaking of that, why would anyone name the trophy that way? It’s the only trophy in sports that’s not named after an individual.

It should be named after the guy who has the most rings: we’ll call it The Berra Trophy