Hey, someone just stole another base on Betances

This is not a time to look for a half-full glass. This is not a time for "well, it's a long season." This is not a time for learned analysis. I'll leave that to my esteemed brethren (and sistren?) elsewhere on this site.

This is a time to eye roll and mutter, "WTF?" This is a time to SMH. This is a time to barf.

Wait a second. Look at the bright side. After this 7-6 loss to Houston, at least I can rest easy this evening safe in the knowledge that one day, probably soon, I will be able to steal a base when Dellin Betances is on the mound.

Yes, me, a regular fan, admittedly in possession of what they used to call a "stylishly stout" physique, could pilfer a pillow (or two, or maybe even three), while Betances is on the hill. He's that horrific at holding runners on. Forget "defensive indifference." This was a whole 'nuther category. Call it "offensive indifference." Because it was indeed offensive.

Speaking of offense, the latest meltdown in the pen (15th blown save this year, they had 16 all of last year, way to go guys) ruined what had been a pretty good night for the Bombers, highlighted by Clint Frazier's double and homer. Even my wife perked up when he came up. "He'd look good in a kilt," she says. I couldn't disagree. And Big John Sterling came through with the perfect HR call of "Downtown Goes Frazier!!" according to a post from Meredith Marakovits on the tweeter. OH! and for crying out loud. Didi hit his first career grand slam. That's what kind of night we had going.

Heck, even Green managed to get the job done. Then Betances comes on and all but sets the ball down and invites baserunners to advance. "Here, come on, no problem, I'll just stand here with my thumb up my wazoo and let you trot on down to second, then third. Oh, and to make things better, I'll even fail to get anywhere near the strike zone, too. Would that be a help? Good, because I'm here to serve."

First Yankee ever to allow at least three steals and one earned run in an outing of less than 1 IP.
Dellin has boldly strode onto turf where the likes of Dooley Womack, Lindy McDaniel and Bill Monboquette have feared to tread. Yeah, I know they weren't all relievers. You get my point.

And then Chapman brings in the gas can, dumps it all over the mound, drops a match, then kneels down like Jimi Hendrix, as we all watch the Yankee victory going up in smoke.

Aaarrrrrgh. And don't even get me started on the game-ending play, where Gardner laces one in the gap, runs almost all the way to second, and then decides oops, and runs back to first where he's thrown out by 12 miles. Yes. Twelve frigging miles. It set a record on Stat Cast for "longest retreat back to first to get thrown out and end a stupid, ridiculous loss." Or LRBTFTGTOAEASRL, to make it easier for you SABR fans. I think it will be a while before it replaces WAR or SNORK in your baseball mythology. After the game, Girardi said he didn't have a problem with the wide turn, that it was the kind of baseball decision a runner has to make. I beg to differ, Joe.

Ugh. Oh well. Rubber game Sunday at 2 p.m. ET.