Saturday, July 13, 2019

We have our Game 1 starter, all we have to do is Cryogenically freeze him

Last night, watching Domingo German tame the Jays - not a bad Ragu, as tomato cans go - the beer, chips, couch and lilting voice of The Master merged together like flesh zombies of the Mind Flayer - (hip pop culture ref there!) - to inspire a solution to the Yankees pitching problems: 

The six-man rotation! 

Why not? Last night, German was pitching on eight days rest, a schedule that fits into the Death Star's plan to cap his innings. To pitch him every fifth day would be prospect abuse. (Last year, age 25, Domingo threw 96 innings overall; he's already at 86.) Realistically, what the Yankees should do is lower him into a vat of liquid nitrogen, freezing him, so he can be thawed on the last weekend of September. (I know what you're thinking: Thaw him on the morning of the ALDS Game One; I say, no! Give him a game to shake off the cold.) Because a few of you scaredy-cats always grouse about my inspirations - (only because you didn't come up with it) - I offer the secondary option: The six-man roll out. 

Masahiro Tanaka
James "Big Maple" Paxton
J.A. Happ
C.C. Sabathia

Insert name here

Obviously, No. 6 is the roster-buster. And let's face it: there is no way C.C. lasts a half-season without visiting the Ellsbury List. We're braced to read that Cooperstown Cashman has traded Clint Frazier, Thairo Estrada and Estevan Florial for this year's Sonny Gray. Odds are, that will happen soon. Aside from a trade, here are the candidates for Sixth Man.

Luis Severino. Nope. He won't return until September, at the earliest. He cannot help curb German's innings.

Luis Cessa. When he threw 4 shutout innings in London, on the pinball surface, we thought... hmm? Then he couldn't last an inning against Tampa. We can't go on forever using him in blowouts. But sixth man? Nope.

Chance Adams. In his last Triple A start, July 5, he went six innings and gave up 4 runs. Blah. Tonight, he pitches in Syracuse. He needs a solid outing. Otherwise, jeez, he's been a disappointment. Let's say nope. 

Nestor (Octavio) Cortes Jr. His delivery hypnotizes batters. Never underestimate a young pitcher capable of this. I'd hate to see the Yankees trade this guy, but can he carry a sixth man load? Doubt it. (Also, the Yankees were warming him in the eighth last night, in case the game was a blow-out. They're still using him as a patchwork reliever.)

Deivi Garcia. He's 20, at Scranton, and streaking through the system. The Railriders - like Trenton before Garcia was promoted - are switching to a six-man rotation. (Adams; Garcia; Daniel Camerena, 26; Randal Delgado, 29; Brodie Koerner, 25; and Raynal Espinal, 27.) Obviously, we're drunk with hope over Garcia. And if he's on a roll, I say, use him! Last year, the Yankees sat on Michael King, who soared through the system, to preserve his arm. It didn't work. King's elbow barked in spring training, and he's only now pitching in minor league games. Some super-hot prospects have a finite number of bullets in their arms, and if Garcia throws well in Scranton, I say, sha-la-la-la-la, let's live for today (old pop culture ref there). Let's bring him up and fire those bullets in a pennant race. Garcia may never again see such a run. But again, this is me being drunk with hope.

Remember: All we need is a sixth guy. We don't need an ace. We have a playoff game one starter. He's fucking 11-2! All we have to do is protect him. 


Rufus T. Firefly said...

Dwight Gooden won't be available:

TheWinWarblist said...

Oh Dwight ...

Fuck you Hal.

TheWinWarblist said...

Hyperbolic this, hyperbole that!!!


Anonymous said...


HoraceClarke66 said...

I'm all for it, Duque! (And incidentally, what pop culture references do we have besides old ones?)

Yes, by all means: Deivi now!

Remember how devastating Fernando Valenzuela was when the Dodgers brought him for the stretch run in 1980? Had they done it a week or two earlier, they might have won the whole shebang that year. And you're right about Mike King.

Thing is—a move like that head would have the pundits narrowing their eyes in consternation: 'Hmm, seems like a pretty risky move! If it doesn't work out, we will have to condemn you for throwing this green kid into the fray...'

Coops hasn't stayed where he is for the last 20 years by taking chances.

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