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Wednesday, September 1, 2021

How Will The Season End?

Not well. I think we can all agree on that. 

However, inspired by the "How many wins will the Yankees have at the end of the year?" contest (and don't you all wish you could lop 10 games off your totals right now? I know I do.) I invite everyone to tell us your best guess on how the season will actually end. 

Will it be an El Chapo meltdown in the 9th inning of the Play-In game?  

Will Joey Gallo throw his back out while stretching in the batters box with the bases loaded and the 2nd Wild Card spot on the line? (And, even though he is signed for next year - never play for the Yankees again.)  

Will Boone inexplicably rest Judge for the Play-In game because it's his time for a day off?  

Maybe we will just lose so many games in the next four weeks that we finish behind Toronto.

Here's mine...  We sweep Tampa on the final weekend of the year and win the division but those insidious Rays send a party bus of Covid infected hookers to the Yankees hotel and the entire team is forced to skip the ALCS. Houston wins by forfeit. 

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I can't offer a case of booze like some of our compatriots but I can offer a case of head lice.  I will freeze dry them and send them to you in a baggie. All you have to do is add water. Just like Sea Monkeys! 

So...  Whose nightmare will become our reality?  

How will the season end? 



12 comments:

ZacharyA said...

Cole pitches 6 strong innings in the Wild Card Game, Loaisiga pitches 2 scoreless innings, and Yanks lead 5-1 headed into the 9th. A's score 5 off Chapman to take 6-5 lead. Yanks load bases in bottom 9th with no outs, but Judge K and Stanton DP to end season.

Scottish Yankee fan said...


Badly

Losing lots of games from a winning position

In the one game playoff with bases loaded Chapman balking in the winning run

Pocono Steve said...

No playoffs. During the game in which the Yankees are mathematically eliminated, the Yankees will be ahead by one run with one runner on in the bottom of the 9th and with Chapman on the mound, who will commit a throwing error on a sac bunt, which is followed by another Yankee throwing error, leading to a bunt walk-off, two-run bunt HR.

TheWinWarblist said...

Pocono Steve may be on to something. Sad and grotesque, but definitely something.

TheWinWarblist said...

I want to be clear that I in NO WAY mean or imply that P-Steve's fever-dream won't or can't come true. Something terrible is going to happen and he may have the inside tract on the specifics. Whatever occurs, it will be sad and grotesque to one degree or another and definitely will saw out our hearts and guts.



The fuckers, all of them.

Kevin said...

"I can't offer a case of booze like some of our compatriots but I can offer a case of head lice. I will freeze dry them and send them to you in a baggie. All you have to do is add water. Just like Sea Monkeys"!

LMAO! I had to take a fishing hook to dislodge my tongue. Too funny!

Ken of Brooklyn said...

The Yankees will go on an unprecedented losing streak, quite literally losing EVERY SINGLE GAME for the rest of the season. It will be all anyone is talking about throughout the sport, Aaron Boone and Cashman will have no answers and it's understood that they will be fired minutes after the last meaningless game of the season. We here at IIHIIFIIC will FINALLY lift our Stadium boycott to attend this last game for our long awaited MEET UP. After much drinking, during the 7th inning stretch The Mighty WinWarblist and 13Bit will be seen colluding on a plan, just then Winnie leaps up, throws off their Yankees MuuMuu (or is it a kaftan?), and proceeds to race down and through the expensive seats ONTO the field, BUCK NAKED!, with Bitty following close behind filming the entire performance. We are ALL inspired as is ALWAYS the case whenever we are within their golden orbit, and we follow in pursuit joining them on the field. Hoss is now doing the Jitter Bug in front of Urshela, Ranger the HuckleBuck in front of Torres, JM, Kevin, Zachary, Pocono Steve, Scottish Fan, the Nice Anonymous(s) and Doug are doing Double Dutch ( who brought the fucking jump rope?) where the over shift should have been, and I'm doing some kind of a surrealist slow motion Butoh that frankly scares off security giving us all a few more minutes of stardom. We are all carted away, but not after we shill for our favorite blog, AND blow a synchronized KISS to Suzyn and The Master!
Boy Oh Boy, will El Duque be sorry he wasn't there to enjoy this in person!

DickAllen said...

I’d pay to see that

Ken of Brooklyn said...

Dick, I meant to add you to the party, apologies my friend, thinking you's be having Vogue competition with Judge in center field, LOL! This team is soooooooo boring (again), just trying to have some fun with this.

And WTH, the game is already happening, and the Yankees are ahead 3-0, what the what????

DickAllen said...

I was there all the way, Ken!

DickAllen said...

I’d be hard pressed to resent a fellow Brooklynite!

DickAllen said...

Besides, I BROUGHT THE JUMP ROPE!!!!!