FIFTY THOUSAND MOONS

Saturday, October 24, 2015

Congatulations to Adam Warren and Ivan Nova, co-winners of 2015 Yankee Plunker Award

Continuing our Post-Season IT IS HIGH Embittered Bouncing Chicken Awards Banquet...

The winners of the 2015 Yankee Plunker Award... to the pitcher who bruised the most opposing batters last season, bringing joy to now joyless, mean-spirited Yankee fans, who are preparing to endure the nuclear winter of a Met championship, while we're expected to sit around and speculate on whether Jacoby Ellsbury will rebound... are...

(... drum roll please to heighten false suspense...)

As stated in the headline above... Adam Warren and Ivan Nova!

(Applause.... Accepting the award for Mr. Warren and Mr. Nova is the ghost of Ryne Duren...

Both Yankee pitchers finished with seven hit batters (also known as plunkings or beanings, though MLB stat geeks don't actually measure headshots, nor do they consider attempted beanings, where the batter simply was acrobatic enough to get out of the way... looking at you, Jackie Bradley Jr....)

The 2015 Yankee Plunk Patrol is as follows:

Adam Warren and Ivan Nova... 7
CC Sabathia... 6.
Andrew Miller... 5
Michael Pineda, Dellin Betances, Nathan Eovaldi, Chris Capuano... 3

Congratulations to all. (And who out there said Capuano wasn't worth $5 mill?)

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

CORRECTION! CAPUANO'S SALARY WASN'T 5 MILLION, IT WAS, "ONLY" 5 MILLION....ROYALS IN 5 OR 6...METS (AND THEIR F'KED UP FAIR WEATHER FANS), WON'T KNOW WHAT HIT 'EM.