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Monday, May 25, 2015

A Memorial Day tradition: Let's celebrate the Yankees' new Bore Four

Hate to say this, but the Yankees right now are not only baseball's most boring team, but they might be the most boring entity in corporate America, after IBM and the company that imports those back-scratchers from China.

Typically, they score two runs early, and then... nothing... nada... zilch. Turn the channel, and reach for the bottle of hair tonic.

Therefore, on this Memorial Day, I propose a new Yankee tradition: THE BORE FOUR.

Think of them as the Four Bores-men of the Yankee Apocalypse.

But who belongs in this zombie-like, death-walking group?

I say Stephen Drew is a cinch, and Carlos Beltran's name pops up, almost as often as he swings and pops up. Didi Gregorious - with a few more attempted behind-the-back flips, (stick out your tongue, Didi, if you want to be like Mike) - is definitely a candidate. After that, it's a crapshot between Chris I and II - Capuano or Young, and the entire non-Betances/Miller bullpen. Garrett Jones would be there, but for his pitching.

3 comments:

Ken of Brooklyn said...

Maybe that 4th position will be an honor bestowed to someone weekly, or daily,,,,,
And of course the Core to the Core Snore would be our beloved Brian Cashman!

JM said...

Instead of the Core Four we now have the Crap Corps. Simply astonishing how quickly these losers have fallen apart, and how spectacularly.

Anonymous said...

Have you geniuses missed that as of late, Didi is hitting and Beltran has been over .300 for the past month. What an embarrassingly poorly written piece.