Too many coincidences suggest Redsocks are trying to fix AL East

This we know: The juju gods are bastards.

But something fishy is going on here, and I hereby call for a probe into suspected Redsock collusion in the 2018 AL East divisional race.  

For two years, we watch Billy McKinney resurrect his status as a prospect, all the time knowing there is no room in the Yankee outfield. Then, on the day he is traded, Aaron Judge fractures a chip and goes out for a month. Coincidence? Sure... if you believe in the Easter Bunny. 

This season has been a nonstop barf of "coincidences," and I'm not buying it.

It happened earlier with McKinney, who was called up in April after Aaron Hicks tweaked something tweakable. No sooner does he arrive than he runs into a wall, wrenches his shoulder, and misses a month. We end up playing - gulp - Shane Robinson. And who the fuck is Shane Robinson? 

Clint Frazier has a great spring when he - get this - runs into a wall and misses two months with a concussion. He comes back, rakes in the minors, but faces a glut of outfielders with no playing time. Days ago, stuck in Scranton because the Yankees have too many outfielders, he dives for a ball and suffers another concussion, and now, with Judge gone, he's hurt.

When they're healthy, there is no openings. As soon as they are hurt, kaboom - we're down to - gulp - Shane Robinson.

And where in this haunted house is Jacoby Ellsbury? Last time the Yankees came to Tampa, before last weekend, the Chief visited the clubhouse and assured reporters he planned to soon start playing. Well, what the fuck? By the way, Ellsbury is a walking testament to Redsock collusion, the baseball equivalent of that perky redhead who infiltrated the NRA. Anybody who checks his nonstop list of injuries will have a field day of conspiracies. But where is he? Why are we suddenly down to playing - gulp - Shane Robinson?

Not long ago, the beauty of the Yankee batting order was its top-to-bottom offensive power. Now, look at the back three and you could find Neil Walker, Kyle Higashioka and - gulp - Shane Robinson. Wow. It's 2014 all over again.

And don't look at Scranton for help. Not long ago, the Railriders were brimming with ascending youth. Now, it's retreads, as indicated by last night's lineup. 

But if there still is hope, it's because the juju gods are truly insane. For reasons never understood by humankind, injuries to stars sometimes galvanize teams. They force others to step up in roles that otherwise would have been marginalized. We have a hole in the outfield and DH. Is Tyler Austin ready to stop sulking and start hitting? What do we have in - gulp - Shane Robinson? And if the juju gods want to avoid a special counsel investigation, maybe they should turn their attention to Boston. Does not Fenway Park have walls?