Meaning amid the meaninglessness: 2021 is all about Gleyber

Quickly now, a test of your mental state. Close your eyes, and imagine two alternative Yankiverses:

Earth Hope. Gleyber Torres plays a solid SS. As his confidence builds, his offense heats up. He his .290 with 30 HRs, bats third, leads the Yanks in MVP balloting, and mutes all NYC radio blather about the greatness of Francisco Lindor.

In their renewed fight against homeritus, the Yankees achieve herd immunity by June. Our sluggers have big years. We take the AL East, winning a Grammy nomination for Hal Steinbrenner.  Global warming is staunched, Elon Musk opens a Starbucks on Mars, and through the miracle of cloning, Skynyrd reunites. 

Earth Dogshit.  Gleyber Torres can't cut it at SS. As his fielding woes grow, his hitting collapses. He becomes an offensive sinkhole. Hoping to salvage him, the Yanks move Gleyber to 2B, shifting DJ LeMahieu to 3B and trying Gio Urshela, Tyler Wade and Thairo Estrada at SS. After nothing works, they resort to an electrically reanimated Troy Tulowitzki. 

Falling behind Toronto and Tampa, our sluggers valiantly swing harder. Strikeouts increase. An iceberg floats down from the North Pole, and penguins overrun the NYC subways. Franciso Lindor wins the Grammy for "Spoken History," Andrew Cuomo dies in a nursing home after hitting on staff, and Hanson reunites.

Clearly, the future of humankind - or our mental states - revolves around the grand experiment of Gleyber Torres playing SS. He is an all-star 2B. But so is LeMahieu. For the Yanks to win, Gleyber must succeed at the position of Derek Jeter. Everything else is a lineup designed by Rube Goldberg. 

So, where are we? 

Well, as Larry David would say, pretty pretty pretty good.

Thus far, Yankee stats show no Gleyber errors - (Mike Tauchman has four, FOUR, WTF?) (NOTE: THIS IS DISPUTED; IT SEEMS HE HAS TWO ERRORS.) - seemingly justifying the early reports from Tampa, which pronounced him in great shape. (These dispatches always skew towards hope; nobody believes them.)  

But today, let us celebrate the most important news from Tampa:

Gleyber is hitting and fielding. Right now, we occupy Earth Hope. Let's enjoy it, while it lasts.