Sunday, July 17, 2022

Forget Juan Soto. Forget Joey Gallo. Forget the looming trade deadline. One more win, and we can rest

 Win today, and we can rest...

Win today, and Boston enters the all star break virtually tied (loss column) with Baltimore for last place in the AL East.

Win today, and we can binge-drink through Friday, swallowing sedatives like a Kardashian after a butt-lift, knowing that nobody can catch us, that our 13-to-14 game lead is baked into a calendar of concrete. Look, just look! at all the games our AL East rivals must still play against each other

The Rays: (36 intra-division games) They play Toronto 11 times, nine with the Yankees, nine with Boston and seven with Baltimore, currently baseball's hottest team. 

The BJs: (42) Eleven with Tampa, nine with Boston, seven with us and 15 (fifteen) with young and ascending Baltimore. (Yikes.) 

The Redsocks: (39) Nine with Tampa, nine with Toronto, nine with us, 11 with Baltimore. 

The O's: (39) Seven with Tampa, six with us, 11 with Boston, 15 with Toronto (Yikes.) 

This is a division where everybody beats on each other. (Boston won two against us, beat its chest and strutted around Fenway, then flew to Tampa and got swept. Ha ha.) If the Yankees can win, say, 16 of their remaining 31 intra-division games (that would mean 15 losses), somebody in the division would have to practically sweep all their AL East games - (Tampa would need to go 34-2) - to overtake us. 

Aint. Gonta. Happen.

Of course, this is a parlor game, and these fancy numbers don't mean shit. After today, the Yankees will have 70 games left - plenty of time to stumble and fumble, and flop into the postseason like Ivana Trump (too soon?) a dead-drunk Alice Cooper. There is also the chance of a dark shift in the earth's magnetic poles if - say - one of our rivals were to obtain Juan Soto. (Whom the Nats claim is on the block.)

It's hard to fathom the trade package they would be required to pay for the 24-year-old Soto. The Nats are no fools, having won a recent World Series via big name fire sales. Also, there is the matter of Soto's contract, expected to go north of $450 million. With the exception of the Dodgers, Phillies and Mets, almost every owner shies away from such price tags. (Our own "Food Stamps" Hal, shamefully, watches his pennies. But to be realistic, with Aaron Judge rattling the cup, it would seem crazy for the Yankees to go after Soto. Hal should be on a Liberty Insurance commercial, where he vows to "only pay for what you need." And to speed up the game, instead of the National Anthem, the p.a. system should just play, "Liberty, liberty, liberty... liberty!)  

Last night, on a far lesser matter, Tim Locastro returned. My guess it's a blip, that he'll take a few innings from the OF workload on the final day, and then return to the Anthracite Capital of Central Pennsylvania. But changes are coming, and it's hard not to anticipate them. Soon, the Yankees will move Joey Gallo, and it won't matter who or what they get: Whatever it is, their lineup will improve. And even if the Yankees don't believe in Estevan Florial, some GM somewhere will be delighted to take him. Would he bring a bullpen lug nut? Or a starter, as part of a package? It won't bring Soto, but cashing in the Florial chip might bring us somebody. 

Win today, and we can savor it all week. Win today, and we can sleep the sleep of freedom.  


99 comments:

JM said...

If we could have both Judge and Soto...if wishes were fishes...

Can you imagine Hal signing a billion dollars' worth of Dad's money for just two guys?

It's a crazy dream. And so impossible.

Rufus T. Firefly said...

Met Ivana Trump in a Crown Room in Atlanta in the mid 90's, in the bar line (shocking, I know) during one of those proverbial "slight" five hour delays. I thought it a little weird that she chatted me up in the drink line. She was actually quite pleasant. Piled on more makeup than a vaudeville performer. After we both got our scotches, she went to take a seat and middle aged men swarmed on her like the soccer ball at an eight year old's match. I went to my dial up connection to try and do some work, which was unsuccessful.

It turned Fellini-esque when I was leaving and met Alan Keyes at the elevator (he was then running for president). All it needed was a couple of circus clowns wandering the concourse.

Rufus T. Firefly said...

Oh, and as Yogi said:

"It ain't over until it's over"

The fat lady is still in the green room.

EDB said...

Would be nice to see.

Beauregard Jackson Pickett Burnside said...

It’s official, part of Red Sox ownership group admits they are all a bunch of racists:

https://www.boston.com/sports/nba/2022/07/16/lebron-james-calls-boston-fans-racist-comments-the-shop/

I voted for Alan Keyes in my first real NH primary. I voted for Herman Cain in my second. Third, yes, Ben Carson but by then it was past when the party founded on Abolition could make that sort of history again. The only time I can say I took a Bostonian attitude was in the Fourth Grade Mock Primary. The class, lead by Ms. Smith’s canvassing, went overwhelmingly for Jesse Jackson. I voted for Dole. Ms. Smith never forgave me.

Rufus T. Firefly said...

Beau,

I couldn't listen to LeFlop for more than 10 seconds. Sorry. Would like to know what he said about plastic faced Henry.

Totally off topic (except racist Boston), but your comment made me think of this:

Around that same time, I got my company's tickets to the Celtics. They were tanking and waiting for Rick Pitino and had ML Carr as coach. ML was a loyal trouper and tried to lose every game. We had seats behind the bench at the first aisle. Well within earshot of the bench. The very drunk racist townie asshole sitting next to us (with his kid even) was swearing up a storm, telling them that they suck (well, duh, they're *trying* to suck).

Anyway, at half time the Celtics had to walk right by us to get to the locker-room. The drunk asshole made the mistake of telling ML that his mother could coach better. That was the opening ML needed. For two solid minutes, he went through all of the things this guy's mother could do. Some not seen outside of Tijuana or 1960's Saigon. It was a beauty to watch. The guy left and never came back.

I had the good fortune to work in the orthopedic ward that the Larry Bird era Celtics' doctor worked at. ML was brutal on the court, but was BY FAR the nicest guy off of it. He would frequently visit other players (no one else would). Actually anyone not named Bird was a pretty nice guy on that team.

Where are you in NH? I'm near the seacoast.

Doug K. said...

We should trade for Soto but not extend him. Three postseasons two full years at whatever he's getting paid now.

That's the move.

13bit said...

fucking autocorrect. here goes again:

I love you all, but I'm not going to drink the Kool-Aid this season. I'll also try to refrain from a big, fat "I told you so" in October. I'll be the designated driver here.

In my high school - back in the 1970s - people self-grouped roughly as "Stones freaks", "Who freaks" and "Beatles freaks." Yes, there were some who were into YES and some fringe shit, but those were the big three. Maybe Zep, but not so much. Anyway, I was NOT a Who freak, but one of them might now be looming up over this blog like a big Macy's Thanksgiving Day parade float, incanting in a deep voice, "WON'T GET FOOLED AGAIN."

Don't buy it, people.

I'm boycotting Hal, Brian and Baboon indefinitely. Randy belongs in the Gowanus canal on a floating duck with a fast leak.

Fuck the fakery. Go stand in the dirt infield in the park next to Yankee Stadium - that's the closest you'll get to the real Yankees. That's their dirt. Go stand there and ask them the deep questions. This ragtag of money-grubbing poseurs are not fit to wipe Thurman's ass.

AboveAverage said...
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borntorun999 said...

Right now, I’m not looking past today, but fearful of what a rejuvenated Chris Sale will do to our woefully inconsistent lineup after Cole decides to challenge Devers with his fastball. At least no Gallo today. No Stanton either, which makes no fucking sense anywhere outside Boone’s head.

AboveAverage said...

Rufus:

Back in August of 2001 in Oakland, CA I was on my way to see my surgeon for the first followup after major wrist reconstruction. I was holding a hardcover copy of ZIM, A BASEBALL LIFE in my good hand, because the wait was long with this surgeon.

After I got in the elevator, Al Davis rushed in just as the doors were closing.

He looked kinda Ivana-Awful, face all puffy and bandaged up from whatever procedure he was there to follow up on. But he was still instantly recognizable. He looked at me, then the book and smiling said, "I LOVE ZIM! GREAT FRIEND, GREAT GUY! HOW'S THE BOOK?" I said I just started and it was fun. I suggested he pick up a copy. "NO, I DON'T HAVE TIME TO READ!" Then I asked him how he thought he was going to do this year (Raiders). "WHATAYA THINK....WE'RE GUNNA DO THE BEST WE CAN....WHAT THE HELL ELSE AM I GUNNA SAY, RIGHT!"

The doors opened at the floor I wish him good luck and he said "THANKS - SAME TO YOU!"

HoraceClarke66 said...

Great stories, guys! Al Davis AND Ivanka AND M.L. Carr. Love it all.

Yeah, as I've mentioned here, I grew up on the North Shore, where the Sox fans were actually quite merciful at the time (mostly because Baltimore dominated, I think), and I didn't find it particularly racist.

BUT...there definitely were and still are those hardcore enclaves of Boston area racists who almost Klan level.

You could see it in how the guys on the other teams they always got on were ALWAYS Black. Reggie, Darryl, Gary Sheffield.

Somehow, they never had a problem with Lenny Dykstra (in the 1986 World Series), or even Billy Martin. They respected them as feisty, worthy opponents. What bullshit.

HoraceClarke66 said...

So, Stanton sitting out so Boone can give him his patented "two straight days off."

Sigh. Stanton will likely have to endure all of 2 at-bats in an exhibition between now and Thursday. But, sure, give him another day off—and just when he seems to be finally getting hotter.

HoraceClarke66 said...

Cole gave Devers the Piazza treatment, then struck him out.

Good for him!

ranger_lp said...

Two cheap runs…we’ll take it…

TheWinWarblist said...

Grab some bench Sale!!!

HoraceClarke66 said...

Nice at-bat by Carpenter. If Gallo ever plays over him again, the whole Yankees brainstrust...should have their brains examined.

HoraceClarke66 said...

Never like to see a player hurt. Though that sentiment is less intense when it comes to Red Sock, I have to admit.

HoraceClarke66 said...

Don't like the big delay when we're rolling, but no avoiding it.

I get the feeling this one is going to be a barnburner, in the end.

AboveAverage said...

No Sale

Doug K. said...

ouch!

Rufus T. Firefly said...

Hoss,

North Shore was outside of the 128 RTA (racist townie asshole) belt for the most part. My wife grew up in Lawrence (not north shore, but north), really a melting pot since the 1800s.

Southie, most of Dorchester, Framingham (even though it was outside 128), Quincy, Medford, ... not so much. Especially Southie, which really pisses me off due to being born with Irish genes. A lot has changed in the last 6 decades, but there are still enclaves of assholedom abounding the city.

Back in the day, the only non-whites in the park were always employees. Either in baseball uniform, janitorial uniform or food-service uniform. The insults I would hear at phenweigh were gross even for the docks. I'm surprised Jim Ed Rice is still announcing for them.

AA,

In pre-cable days, I grew up a Raiders fan, because the Giants were both boring and losing. 2001 was the beginning of Al Davis's decline into senility. Too bad. He was really the self made billionaire that just wanted to win.

---

Speaking of assholes, too bad about Sale. At least he had the courtesy of doing it early in the game.

And my feed out of Bucharest is working nicely to watch the game and have John & Suzyn synced to the video.

Beauregard Jackson Pickett Burnside said...

Rufus, I’m in Jaffrey. Used to spend lots of time in the seacoast because …. And this is going to sound ridiculous… WTSN 1270 AM out of Dover would broadcast the Yankees feed and as a displaced NJ boy that was the only way to hear the game. You could pick up WABC after dark but for anything in the day you had to drive east of Epping and pick up WTSN. Maybe this week I’ll take a drive out but WTSN plays the Red Sox now….

Beauregard Jackson Pickett Burnside said...

WTSN is same reason I went to UNH!

AboveAverage said...

T-Fire-

Maybe the treatments Davis was getting on that hot August Oakland day helped push him over the edge into the world of senility.

His face was weirdly swollen, bandaged and kabuki-like, so it likely was intensive treatment for skin cancer.

Nice to chat with him though . . . spontaneous perk

Rufus T. Firefly said...

Beau,

I'm probably closer to you here in southern Vermont right now.

Do know the Dannekers? Worked with one for years. He's retired on a lake there in Jaffrey.

I listened to WTSN for years! They used to advertise the "New York Pizza" from somewhere in Maine and a weird funeral home ad that made no sense to me. They stopped airing the games a few years ago and I was in mourning for quite a while. Now the only option for me is paying mlb. In VT I can get WGY out of Albany, but the reception is horrible. The Hartford radio station dropped the Yankees a while ago too.

Beauregard Jackson Pickett Burnside said...

The Yankee stadium organist just played Lil Nas X Industry Baby. You ain’t hearing that in Fenway!

No need for AM radio with MLB and unlimited data. We live in wonderful times

Dannaker? I don't know anyone. That’s the point of living like a unibomber :)

Rufus T. Firefly said...

Beau,

No, you hear Neil Diamonds *worst* song in phenweigh. Not even Red, Red, Wine.

Don't say bomber in Jaffrey. People are touchy about buildings blowing up in Jaffrey!

I just hate paying the overlords at mlb. If I could do it directly to WFAN, I would.

AA,

Was Jerry Garcia there also?

JM said...
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JM said...

Cole is dealing.

JM said...

Locastro is seriously fast.

JM said...

DJ!

JM said...

Nice hit.

JM said...

Feels like I showed up here and cleared the room.

JM said...

The hits keep on a-comin'.

ranger_lp said...

Carpenter again…

Doug K. said...

Carpenter! You're not alone JM

Beauregard Jackson Pickett Burnside said...

Sorry JM, game got interesting.

ranger_lp said...

Timmy!!!

JM said...

Locastro showing more power than Gallo.

Joe of AZ said...

Gallo will be filing for unemployment soon

JM said...

Sox defense kinda blows.

JM said...

I knew you guys were out there. :)

BernBabyBern said...

Joey Gallo since June 14:
6-for-63, 31 Ks, 2 HR, 6 RBI

Matt Carpenter this weekend (so far):
3-for-7, 2 Ks, 2 HR, 10 RBI

Just sayin'.

JM said...

Only 11-2. Cole better go a strong seven or the bullpen might not hold it.

Platoni said...

Locastro doing everything better than Gallo, including hair

JM said...

Bern, how Gallo gets any playing time whatsoever is a fucking mystery.

Ken of Brooklyn said...

How SWEET it is, a laugher!
And Locasto's homer caught the Master off guard, his call was LO,,,, LO, ??? Oh well,hahahaha!

BernBabyBern said...

JM, I would not be surprised if Gallo suddenly develops a mysterious "hip injury" (a la Jacoby Ellsbury) and quietly goes away to collect his paychecks.

JM said...

Lol

JM said...

Yeah, Bern, that would make sense.

AboveAverage said...

Is Gallo even in the dugout?

Didn't see him there after Locastro hit his HR?

Also I like that Locastro is sporting a Twitch-Cut - Funny stuff.

In addition, F.Fly - Garcia wasn't there. Just me and my three pound external fixiture.

HoraceClarke66 said...

Maybe he flew out early for the All-Star Game.

TheWinWarblist said...

Only 2 of the 11 runs scored on a HR.

TheWinWarblist said...

The only thing better than clobbering the Sux is doing it 2 days in a row!

ranger_lp said...

We just had a Joey Whiffs sighting…

HoraceClarke66 said...

Well, this is an excellent game in which for him to make an appearance.

HoraceClarke66 said...

Toronto managed to hold off KC, 4-2.

TB was up 6-0 on Baltimore, but the Orioles have cut it to 7-5, top of the 8th.

ranger_lp said...

Are you kidding me?

Doug K. said...

Glad Joey is going out on a high note. Hopefully that was his last AB as a Yankee

HoraceClarke66 said...

A Roy Smalley special.

That was the worst thing the Sox could do to us.

Also, he stood there and admired it for a moment. My, my.

HoraceClarke66 said...

Now, it won't be, Doug K.

HoraceClarke66 said...

Paulie O'Neill now giving out grades on the first half.

borntorun999 said...

Gallo..what a whine.

AboveAverage said...

Michael Kay sure loves the front office . . . .

borntorun999 said...

Chris Sale on 7/12/22
I’m not broken anymore,” Sale said. “It’s different this year. It’s definitely different this year. That’s all I’ve really got to say.”
Irony: It's Not Just for Breakfast Anymore.

AboveAverage said...

Kay pushed his chair back, stood up and bent over prior to singing their praises

HoraceClarke66 said...

I was about to write, 'Why is LeMahieu still in a 13-2 game?' and then he got plunked.

He's staying in the game, which is a good sign. But Boone should pull him NOW.

HoraceClarke66 said...

Gallo up, bases loaded.

HoraceClarke66 said...

And flies out to right.

At least the universe has not turned wholly inside out.

Rufus T. Firefly said...

Sure,

I step out to knock down a few trees and all hell breaks loose!

Joey's trade value went up. Woo-hoo!

HoraceClarke66 said...

How is it possible Chapman did not get into this game?

I could see them pitching Loaisiga, which they're doing now. But Luetge for the 8th? Why?

Rufus T. Firefly said...

Hoss,

Too close of a game. They want to keep the momentum going into the break.

AboveAverage said...

Lasagna is BACK

ranger_lp said...

Yankees Win!!!

BernBabyBern said...

More fun stats ...

Hits Joey Gallo has in the last month: 7

Times Michael Kay has said, "Boy, did he need that one!" after a Joey Gallo hit in the last month: 7

AboveAverage said...

Irony - Number of twitches per second: 7

Rufus T. Firefly said...

AA,

I must have been thinking of a different rehab center.

Nice to have Lasagna have a good outing to not remember the hideous one.

LeMahieu, Judge, and Rizzo hit. At some point they have to retaliate. Can't have the beaneaters plunking the main guys and repeatedly get away with it.

And Joey Callo should never, ever put on a Yankee uniform again. Locastro is better, Miggy is better, Florial is better. Hell, Ryan LaMarre would be better. What am I thinking? Mariano Rivera would be better, even at his age. His last at bat was an inside the park homer.

HoraceClarke66 said...

I guess that "retaliation" for Cole NOT hitting Devers, but daring to pitch inside to the great man. Who, incidentally, practically stands on the plate, incidentally, Crazy Carl Everett style.

Another incidental: Dever with his 12th error of the year today. He had 22 last year.

But somehow, the Yanks can't put Miggy at third?

AboveAverage said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
AboveAverage said...

Ruf:

At least GalTwitchLo (Affleck) can remember that he hit a Home Run during his last game as a Yankee.

If indeed it was his last game.

But where will he go other than the scrap heap?

Who would want the guy?

If only there was such a thing as a . . .

DESIGNATED FIELDER

(you listening, Mr ManFred?)

JM said...

He could be the roaming outfielder in a beer league.

HoraceClarke66 said...

Cubs finally managed to beat the Mets today. Dave Robertson shut them down in the 9th. Can't we get him? Maybe for Chappie?

Joe of AZ said...

Reds would take Gallo in a deal for Castillo I think

Rufus T. Firefly said...

Joe of AZ,

I'd think they'd have to include at least Judge in that deal for the Reds to make the trade.

If the intern is as good as he thinks he is, he would tell them to take Stanton and Gallo for Castillo.

...then I woke up.

AboveAverage said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
AboveAverage said...

JM -

Are you sure you did mean a roaming outfielder in a WINE league?

Kevin said...

Hoss, when Miggy hits like Devers, then I will march with you on The Brain's flotation globe (picture "Invaders from Mars") and demand DEMAND that Miggy starts.

Carl J. Weitz said...

Too much hubris in here now.
I'm going to have to contact that doctor that used to frequent this blog. I have his name and email somewhere. The guy with the special powers who had a long list of patrons who attested to his prowess. I'm going to pay him to reanimate Gene Mauch so he can post periodically here about the history of the 1964 Phillies.

TheWinWarblist said...

Thuhuhuhuh Yankees win!!

13bit said...

they win. we lose.

AboveAverage said...

They Lose

We Lose

No Win

Must Win

A Win-Win!

A WIN-WIN-WIN!

Winny?

HoraceClarke66 said...

I hear ya, Kevin. But you know, Devers' lifetime OPS is .866. Andujar, in his rookie year, before all the miseries, had an OPS of .855.

And "only" 15 errors at 3B, not 22.

Just sayin'...

HoraceClarke66 said...

I agree about the hubris, Carl Weitz, and hate to add to it.

But you know...the Yanks' first draft pick tonight even seemed pretty decent. A Judge-sized, Vandy RF, Spencer Jones, who some people are calling the best hitter in the SEC.

If this keeps up, I'm gonna have to get to whole other fucking zeitgeist.

DickAllen said...


Carl, please do not ever bring up the subject of the 1964 Phillies in my presence.

DickAllen said...


And just to add to the hubris of the day, the past two days have been the best sex I've ever had.

AboveAverage said...

Ever? Really? Golly DICK

DickAllen said...


AA, it's a long story

HoraceClarke66 said...

Sorry. Meant to say, "I'll have to change my whole fucking Weltanschauung."

My brother-in-law was a 10-year-old rooting for that team, DickAllen. Coming less than a year after the trauma of the Kennedy assassination, I think it scarred him for life.