Update from Mustang: Most of the links in this post don't work anymore. You must take their claims at face value.
This is an El Duque post from 2019:
Tonight, we once again battle the big-spending, hate-filled, deep-state Redsocks - a franchise steeped in racism and violence, which for decades preferred to blame its defeats on a supernatural, anti-God, anti-America "curse," rather than its own failed policies.
These are horrible, wretched, human beings, the absolute worst, whose treasonous attempts to hurt the Yankees are an attack upon America. These monsters in human form should be investigated by MLB and made examples of, by spending the rest of their lives in prison, where they can't do any more damage. They are enemies of the people, and the mere wearing of their illegal "B" caps in public represents a breakdown of basic morality and an affront to our democracy.
Did I mention that they are liars, and anything they say - such as denying the above words - proves everything I'm saying is right! Trouble is, the Boston-leaning announcers on YES never give the Yankees a break. Did you know that the traitorous David Cone, at the end of his career, sold out and pitched for Boston?
Tonight, as we take up arms against this red tide of human scum, we must show them that we have not forgotten their evil history.
Red Sox complicity in U.S. torture flights
They fed their own fans prison food
They're bigger racists than Joe Torre ever was
Their groundskeepers are thugs
Varitek clawed A-Rod's face, kept his own mask on
Schilling poured ketchup on his sock, called it blood
They decapitate their players when they're done with them
Big Papi had it in for Joba for no reason
They tried to freeze out John and Suzyn.
They can't lose a game without whining about something.
Damn them. Demand that the pro-Redsock YES announcers give the Yankees a fair break! Tonight, we fight.
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75 comments:
Brilliantly said!
To paraphrase Horatio Nelson and Isoroku Yamamoto (well-known Yankees fans, both):
The Bronx expects every man to do his duty!
WILD CARD PROBABILITIES, AS OF THIS MORNING
FANGRAPHS BASEBALL-REFERENCE
RED SOX 97% 94.4%
BLUE JAYS 40.5 55.0
YANKEES 56.4 41.9
MARINERS 5.3 8.1
(Formatting got screwed up, but I think the chart is still decipherable.)
Notice that Baseball-Reference gives the Blue Jays a better chance than the Yankees despite their being a game behind the Yanks. I think that B-R is probably incorporating the following: the Yankees are 6-10 so far against Toronto and Boston; the Yankees are 1-6 in Fenway this season and 2-4 at the Toronto home park; and 7-9 against TB (all their upcoming opponents). If past is prologue, then the Yankees are fucked.
ALSO--The Red Sox' last six games are against Washington and Baltimore; of Toronto's last nine games, six are against Minnesota and Baltimore; whereas the Yankees' last nine games are against Boston, Toronto, and Tampa Bay. Draw your own conclusions.
We're doomed. Might as well start drinking.
Torres is hitting over .300 the last month and a half. Hard to believe. He's noticably better lately.
This is a nice start.
and that's why Like doesn't start.
Doug K.
luke
Giancarlo!!!
6-0. We need more.
Eovaldi stinks tonight.
In the jungle
The Red Sox Jungle
Eovaldi stinks tonight....
Doug K
Lol! And a-wimoweh to that.
What the fuck is happening?!?!?
We showed up.
Are the Yankees playing Chico’s Bail Bonds?
This is the first time I’ve seen these nasty ugly jerseys. The gods will have their revenge.
Some of those runs belong to Montgomery
How did this happen?? DickA, I think all those runs belong to Monty.
Which was very generous of Monty!
Rizzo failing to pad the lead there will cost us the game.
I know I shouldn’t be, but I’m fantasizing about a Boston Massacre
DiiiiiiiiiccckkkAlllllleeeeennnnnnnnnnn you get that blaspheming out of your mind RIGHT NOW!!!
Rosie O'Donnell died?
What juju got invoked?
Can't we go with a fat Bostonite? How about Big Papi?
Gallo is just not a good hitter.
Here we go.
Plenty of innings left for the bullpen to still blow this.
Cole running out of gas…
No lead is safe.
Gay Bar!! I mean, Gleyber!!!
Hit after hit after hit.
They're set up. If they don't tee off this fuckin' inning, we lose.
Gleyber making it a challenge for the bullpen. More heroic losing the hard way.
Gay bar?? Where?? I need a new hangout!
I'm trying to remmember. Is that color combination Krusty the Klown, or SpongeBob SquarePants.
Nothing wrong with gay bars, as long as I'm not required to be practicing.
Chico's bail bonds never came to my aid.
Wasn't there a NHL team that had those ridiculous colors?
Brazilian World Cup Team!
Lost by a touchdown to the Germans!
At home!
Oh good. Chad is warming up. Because my reflux needs to be worse.
UCLA colors.
Does the infield defense just feel a little too crisp and tidy, or is it me?
5 run lead with two down in the 8th and it feels like a nail biter.
Yes, Winnie!
And if Glay Bar was in a gay bar, he NEVER would have slid off the bag!
JM,
It IS a nail biter.
CAN THEY DO IT!?
YES THEY CAN!!
AB,
...as modeled by Jerry Remy and Dustin Pedroia.
Remember that five-run lead we took into the bottom of ninth at Houston not that many months ago?
FlopSweat is getting warm in case Chad gets in trouble. Because that'll work out swell.
Biting nails.
To quote Johnny Lasagna: "It all happened so fast ..."
Bleeding hemorrhoids.
Pocono Steve, please man. Don't jinx the Yankees. It doesn't take much
The red sux are the reason to keep the Yankee's no facial hair policy.
They are some butt fucking ugly beards, on even uglier faces.
The missus even hates ravech's horrible toupee.
My wife hit on the shade of yellow. Rubber ducky.
I'm not jinxing them, Platoni. I'm "bringing the neg," and I want them to win just as much as you do even though, "structurally," it would probably better if they would just lose out the season so that needed changes might actually be made. We're in a very weird place right now.
Jesus, we won.
Woo hoo.
How did that happen? What's going on?
Bosch, you kidder.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mh85R-S-dh8
Pocono, you may be a smooth operator. My butt-crack just became all sweaty and moist.
I'm with you, Steve. Rooting for the win while wishing for loss. Or is that rooting for loss and wishing for the win? It's very confusing
I am so ashamed of myself
We should all be ashamed of wasting our emotions all season on this destined to fail miserable bunch.
Unless, of course, if they win again tomorrow.
Back at you, Winnie! And Platoni, "rooting for the win while wishing for the loss" comes with Knicks and Giants fandom, too. It creates an odd, fluttery feeling in the stomach resolved only with alcohol.
Once again, I have to point out how streaky these guys are. It's unlikely, but...
Don’t look now, but the Mariners are slowly creeping up.
Why bring Chad Greene in with a five run lead? Shoulder inflammation starting to settle down?
I know if we make the playoffs it will vindicate miser Hal and Boone's mismanagement
Part of me wants to see us fail long term I think it would be better
But then once the game starts and I see
and hear the bawheid unshaven neanderthal toothless Boston fans (and the men are worse) I want to win very badly
Scottish Yankee fan,
The men are much worse. Which is like saying that smell is worse than month old fish in pig shit. With manure and rat feces sauce.
Hilarious, Scotland! And I hope they keep playing in those awful yellow uniforms.
Also, the 'Cuse win on a last-second field goal. The question is just what Duque was doing to bring the karma tonight.
And finally, can we just say again, how much we love the Twins?
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