Wednesday, May 4, 2022

Struggling to maintain negativity in an 11-game winning streak. (Looking at you, Scranton!)

I'm appalled. Angry and appalled. You should be, too. It's appalling. Scranton, that is. Five straight losses. Five! It hurts. It affects everything. I can't write long sentences! Too appalled.  

In case you missed it, the Scranton Railriders have now lost five straight. Five. The Lehigh Valley Iron Pigs came to town and ate our Happy Meals. FUCKING CASHMAN, CAN'T YOU DO ANYTHING RIGHT?

Last night, we couldn't score a run against the Rochester Garbage Plates. Remember Greg Bird's comeback? He's hitting .148 - 8 for 54 - with 2 HR. He's 29. ARE YOU SEEING THIS, CASHMAN?  

Yes, I am struggling to find things to complain about. But expressing grievance is central to not only current American politics but Reverse Juju. Being negative is how you go on winning streaks. Once we we grow fat and pampered - once we stop flinging ashtrays into the wall - the Yankees fall apart. Therefore, in the name of hope, let's stay negative. On that note...

1. Over the last few games, no doubt about it: We've simply been lucky. We've seen opposing teams drop infield pop-ups and boot DP grounders. Last night, the Jays comically botched a rundown at home plate (with help from a lucky bad umpire call.) The Prophet Yogi once said he'd rather be lucky than good. I agree. Could we soon receive comeuppance from the juju gods? 

3. With every Aaron Judge HR, I imagine Food Stamps Hal descending like Darth Vader into his mediation pod. There, he crunches the numbers on how much more it will cost him to keep No. 99 next winter. Is there such a thing as infinity plus one? 

What if 2022 turns out to be Judge's long-awaited MVP season? He would have called the Yankees' bluff in spectacular fashion. At what point would the front office panic, knowing that the Mets, Dodgers or even Boston lie ready to offer Judge the sun and moon (and a planet-to-be-named later.) If the Yankees wait until November - then to be outbid by some trillionaire - they'll receive next to nothing for the next generation's Jeter. 

This could become a very troubling narrative for the second half of 2022. 

3. I keep waiting for the coachmen to turn back into mice, but for now - with starting pitchers still on pitch counts - games are being decided by bullpens, and ours is the best in the game. Last night, Alek Manoah had us confined - but we knew he wouldn't make it into the seventh. 

A month from now, dominating starters will be lasting 7-8 innings, rather than the current 5-6. Still, our own rotation has been stellar. All we can do is keep fingers crossed. Meanwhile, I keep waiting for Miguel Castro to have that 10-runs-without-recording-an-out outing, but he's still holding it together. 

4. Joey Gallo. Always. Our go-to complaint. May he always be tweaked and squeezing eye drops into those bulging peepers. He is a Reverse Juju jewel.

15 comments:

The Archangel said...

We can do negative reverse JuJu by harping on what an utter failure the Martian has been this season

JM said...

The time for negativity will return, as surely as the swallows to Art Metrano.

TheWinWarblist said...

Struggling to maintain negativity? Who are you!? IT'S LIKE I DON'T EVEN KNOW YOU ANYMORE!!!!

el duque said...

An 11-game winning streak takes a toll on all of us.

Carl J. Weitz said...

I hope a championship season doesn't put IIHIIFIIC out of business!

Joey G. should add a " w" to the end of his last name.

JM said...

Maybe Joey partakes too much of wines from the vineyards of Ernest and Julio.

ZacharyA said...

The one thing I've seen early this season that I actually believe is a real improvement is our infield defense.

Higashioka and Trevino can't hit, but they're a big pitch framing upgrade over Gary Sanchez. I believe Trevino is top-10 in framing runs so far, according to Statcast. Higgy's blocking and throwing have been very subpar so far, but again, we're comparing these guys to Gary Sanchez, who could barely field the position by the end of his tenure here.

A full season of Anthony Rizzo is such a big improvement over Luke Voit, Mike Ford, Chris Gittens and whoever else we were running out there in the first half of 2021. Rizzo makes the entire infield better.

Gleyber Torres isn't going to win any defensive awards, but he's clearly better (or at least limits the damage) at second base, with two Gold Glovers on his left and right.

Isiah Kiner-Falefa is an excellent defensive player and just a monstrous upgrade over Gleyber Torres's attempt to play shortstop in 2021.

Josh Donaldson isn't the defender he used to be, but he makes most of the plays and he's not worse than Gio Urshela who was playing on a bad knee in 2021.

DJ LeMahieu is just a solid defender wherever you put him.

When was the last time the Yankees could run out an infield with a good-to-great defender at every position?

AboveAverage said...

"Must we continue to wine about Gallow when more pressing issues threaten the collective eggshell fragility of all the is good in our world? We brux and we grind to the quick as we turn these things around and around in our minds like a giant, spinning kidney stone lodged in the center of our brains. My friends - up until now, this very day, this exact moment in time I have resisted buying back in to MLB-TV. But its so hard to continue resisting because my craving for watching baseball now is so incredibly intense - its like a thousand vintage Eletrolux canister vacuums sucking all the air out of my body (tiny ones all operated by little bloated Cashmans all done up like 50's housewives). I may have to throw in the towel and resubscribe BUT I KNOW when I do, Boone's Boys will start losing game after game after game. I'm gunna go brew another pot of Torre.

HoraceClarke66 said...

Brilliant, AA!

And HEY! WHERE ARE THE BEAUTIFUL WOMEN FOR THIS WIN STREAK??? HMMM??? WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON???

Parson Tom said...

Holding off on MLB tv supscription too. They can do without me for another month.

Parson Tom said...

renewing with MLB tv would reek of optimism. Nobody will ever see me happy about the Yankees.

borntorun999 said...

ain’t seen no womenfolk round these here parts.

and no womenparts round these here folks.

May the fourth be with you! ( sorry I type with a slight lisp)

AboveAverage said...

Personally I don't celebrate May the Fourth until Cinco de Mayo and then its crazy town. You know what I mean . . . dipping chips and taking sips and watching me some Star Trek

DickAllen said...


I was really worried that, as the Yankees keep winning, we would need to put Winnie on a 24-hour suicide watch.

Glad to see you're okay. So far.

EDB said...

Duque:
I must give the Yankees their due. Take a look at Scranton, the Genius loads them with former major league failures and players over 25, every season.