Thursday, November 21, 2013

Can you feel that wind? It's about to blow A-Rod and Cano out of our lives

Yesterday, the Texas Rangers traded Ian Kinsler to Detroit for Prince Fielder and money. Yep, Prince Fielder and cash. Now, with their Tex-Mex version of the YES Network, the Bush Rangers can light their hundred dollar bills with twentys. The oil glut has returned! Suddenly, all that talk about lack of bidders for Robbie Cano looks like last week's Fox News war on Christmas. A big fat wallet just stepped into the auction barn, and he needs a second-baseman...

Yesterday, Alex Rodriguez went Harry Truman on his own hearing, yowling about unfairness in MLB's famed court system for witches and kangaroos. Let's face it: MLB keeps two sets of rules: one for A-Rod and one for everybody else. (See Bartolo Colon.) Yes, our boy has been screwed. But the world is about to invoke the Saddam Rule: When a guy reaches a certain level of loathsomeness, the facts don't interfere with his lynching.  If ever there was a sign of desperation, rushing from your hearing to talk with Mike Francesa is as certain as it gets. I always figured A-Rod would whittle his ban down to 50 or 65 games. Not anymore...

The Gammonites keep saying that if Team Steinbrenner sheds the contracts of A-Rod and Cano, they'll have "big money" to sign "big names." That sounds exciting! But upon further review, the "big names" turn out to be Brian McCann and Carlos Beltran - the reincarnated souls of Matt Nokes and Danny Tartabull.

It's happening, folks. Can you feel it?

The earth is cracking beneath our feet.

Remember how it seemed as though the Yankees would never fall apart, that they would contend every year, and that rooting for this team would be the one sure thing in our lives that wouldn't let us down?

It's happening, folks. 

We have a team without one ascending player in our starting lineup - not one - and a wave of old-timers on the accelerating down slope of their careers.

We have a team whose home attendance has plummeted since 2009, with no end in sight.

We have a team whose TV ratings fell by about 30 percent last season - and without interest drummed up over A-Rod's return, they would have fallen far more.

We have a team whose farm system has failed to produce an impact starter for three years, with nobody on the near horizon. 

We have team playing in a soulless, concrete, giant dog dish, built for all the wrong reasons, while our arch-rivals celebrate three championships in a decade, playing in the type of baseball cathedral that we had - and tore down.

We have a team in free-fall. It has yet to bottom out.

That wind, my friends, it's going to blow more than A-Rod and Robbie out of New York. It's swirling through the stadium, it's carrying a pungent aroma, and it's here to stay.


JM said...

Hey, maybe we can trade the Dean of Swing to Detroit for that Cabrera guy. Maybe some cash, too, what the hell.

Alphonso said...

All I want to do is beat Dallas at home!