Thursday, September 25, 2008

Open Letter to Brian Cashman: Does Your Contract Include a Hatchet?

Dear Madam or Sir,

Supposedly, Hank and Hal are giving you a week to decide whether to return as Yank consigliare.

If I were you, I'd would call and say "yes" today.

No, right now. Before finishing this post.

Before they change their minds.

Frankly, Mr. Cashman, you had a crapola year. You batted .224 with 6 home runs, which means you G.M.'ed the way Melky Cabrera played.

It's not your deals. (Hell, who'd complain about trading Kyle Farnsworth?) Or the deal you whiffed on. (Santana's good, but we still believe in Phil Hughes.) No, sir. It's something else.

It's the organization you built: Corruption among Latin American scouts, hubris in drafting kids who've made it clear they will not sign, aging hacks who clog the path for youngsters merely through the magnitude of their contracts, a marquee player whose life is turning into a succession of pole dancers and strikeouts with runners on base.

No, Mr. Cashman, something is horribly wrong with the organization you've built.

This is not a championship franchise. It's the Titanic.

So... if they want you back, say yes... soon.

And now, to the nitty gritty of this message.

Sir, if you're attached to this team and the personalities that comprise it... please quit. Now.

If you feel as though your friendship to certain players will inhibit your ability to let them go... please, walk. Now.

If you think the Yanks just need a tweak, a free agent, or a couple breaks from the umps next year, and everything will be OK, because the new stadium will sell-out anyway... please, sir... do yourself a favor... go.

Somebody has to exhume this Yankee cadaver, pull the organs apart with tweezers and somehow insert a new heart, a new brain and some courage.

The Wizard can't just give this team a ticking clock, a college diploma and third place medal for the American League East.

It's going to be messy this winter.

If you don't want blood on your hands... please, go. Now.

Seattle is nice in the fall. You can probably even trade for Melky.


Anonymous said...

In theory, Cashman's promises to build up the organization from the bottom up so they don't need to sign any more Kevin Browns or Jaret Wrights or Carl Pavanos or Alex Rodriguezes or...well you get the idea, or retain any more Melkys just for the sake of retaining someone from the farm system sounded nice. They sounded almost like the second coming of Gene Michael.

But then we saw that the "new" Cashman was just the old Cashman in disguise. This wasn't a second coming of the Stick. In fact, it was...[cue music] The Anti-Stick!

I see no particular need for the Anti-Stick to stick around. Tyler Kepner wrote in today's Times that Girardi was under the impression he and Cashman would be a team as long as Smilin' Joe was manager. All the better. Let's kill two birds with one stone. Bye, Brian. Bye, Joe. Don't let the door hit you in the ass on the way out.

Anonymous said...


Excellent work.

I wish we could same about the clowns in Washington who are trying to piss away another $700 Billion to their friends with no accountability, and no drawing on the objective, non-political minds who actually have good ideas.

Maybe we can get Theo Epstein.

Anonymous said...

I tend to want to see/hear/read about an answer from Brian Cashman sooner than later.

Witht the Yankees heading into on of their more over-turning offseasons, the FO, not to mention free agents, need to know who is in charge: Cash, Hank or a team around Hank if Cash goes?

Here's to hoping Cash doesn't drag this out and make it a back-page spectacle for two weeks.

Either take it and run with it, or run to Seattle!

The Shamus

Anonymous said...

Great letter, duque!

The Shamus

Anonymous said...

I think you made some great points about him but I want him back next year. Everything that can be done to improve the roster will be done. No matter who is the GM. But Cashman is good at making deals and probably way better then anyone whos available. (read: Mets are extending Omar)
But my chief concern are the scouts. I dont think we were getting accurate information from them all year and its part of the reason why our hitting was so unremarkable.
But fire Kevin Long too just to be safe.