Thursday, September 25, 2008

Don't say we didn't warn you!

This is what our wise and exalted leader, El Duque, wrote just seven months ago on this very blog! (Of course, he wrote it with lots of big, bold, oversized letters in a whole bunch of different colors, but this will have to do):

Last October, the New England Redsocks won...

Now, a recession looms...


Since 1912, the Yanks have dominated baseball in all but six distinct periods, each characterized by unrest, economic downturns and war.

1. World War I (1913-1921): No pennant; more than 600 games lost. Red Sox win fourth Series in six years. Flu epidemic kills 650,000.

2. The Great Depression (1929-1931): No pennant. In October 1929, the Yanks finish 18 games out. Within weeks, the New York Stock Exchange collapses.

3. World War II (1941-46): One mere championship, team ravaged by military draft, massive deaths, finishes third or lower most years.

4. Vietnam War-Watergate (1965-1975): No pennant, no hitting, resignation of Richard Nixon, numerous managers.

5. Recession, Iran-Contra, Gulf War (1982-1995):
No pennant. In 1986, White House trades arms for hostages, and Yanks trade Doug Drabek for Rick Rhoden.

6. War on Terror (Sept. 11, 2001-present): No championship. And the Redsocks -- the terrorists -- have two.

To the average American, Yankee supremacy is normal.

Thus, each Yank loss heightens our collective sense of insecurity, undermining the nation's political and economic health.

By rooting for the Yankees, we at IT IS HIGH are rooting for America and trying to avoid recession.

And you who would root against us... ask yourself:

Do you care about your country?

Now look what's happened: The Yankees have missed the playoffs for the first time in 13 years and Yankee Stadium has been closed down ... and, suddenly, the United States - and, for that matter, the rest of the world - is teetering on the brink of a financial disaster, with taxpayers being asked to spend $700 billion to prevent the nation's economy from imploding.

Coincidence? Yeah, right.

So, for all you folks cheering that the Yankees' playoff run is over ... think about that when your next 401(K) statement comes in the mail -- and realize you have nobody to blame but yourselves (and, of course, Kennedy, Hughes, Cano, A-Rod, Melky, Giambi, the doofuses who decided to tear down Yankee Stadium, etc. ... )

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

If we dont get CC I think Ill look into getting the YES network in my bunker for next season.