Wednesday, March 30, 2011

What Is It With The Yankees And Lefty Relievers?

1. Sergio Mitre, for whom we traded Jose Tabata, a mid-range pitcher (whose name I forgot), and two prospects is on the 60 day disabled list, after missing all of the last two seasons with arm problems.

Isn't he always disabled? Are we sure his name isn't Pavano?

2. Feliciano was the one member of the NY Mets who always showed up for work. He had never been on the DL his entire career. Now, he sneezes and breaks a rib, pulls a quad muscle and strains an oblique. The Nick Johnson of 2011. Watch.

3. Kei Igawa is our $51 million dollar experiment in international relations. A career leader in wins for AAA. Bad teeth. And no hope of ever recording an important out for the Yankees. Kudos to our scouting staff.

4. Boone Logan was a number 1 pick of the Phillies when I was in third grade. He has done marginally well against the one lefty he faces per game, unless he walks him. He has never gotten out a righty batter.

5. Somebody named Harrison is likely to go north with the team until the Feliciano person pretends to be healthy again.

I also think:

1. Chavez, until he gets injured, will be one of our best off season acquisitions.

2. Jorge will struggle and we'll be calling for Jorge II (Vasquez) or Jesus to DH by June.

3. AJ will be a 8-10 game winner, despite the occasional good outing. I am going to order a fatwah on the first f****** announcer who tells us, " what great stuff AJ has."

4. Tex will not start out well, despite all the machinations to do so. But he, as always, will contribute mightily to our success through defense.

5. Andruw Jones is a real wild card and I am betting he gives us a lot of outs in big situations. If Greg Golsten recovers, I'd sooner see him as back-up.

6. We have to get Cervelli back, and soon. Molina should be bullpen guy and emergency back-up.

7. Russell Martin will be the best off-season acquisition.

8. Opening day ( night ) will either be a rain out or extended until 2am by rain/sleet delays. I advise everyone to sell their tickets to some rube, and sit in a bar.


Jeers said...

That's Marte not Mitre you're talking about.

I'll just assume that's the Crown Royal talking.

el duque said...

Sleet delay? Haven't we been there for sleet?

Joe De Pastry said...

We have to get Cervelli back for his incredibly weak bat or his sloppy defense?

Nat King Cole said...

Classic work by the King of Juju

Alph the Seer said...

I apologize for the Mitre flop. He isn't a lefty.

Is was Marte. He has been on the DL so long, I forgot he actually exists.

I am usually extremely precise and accurate as you all know.

Unless I am inebriated.

Which is most always.