Saturday, July 23, 2011

10 Reasons the Yankees must trade for Johnny Damon

1. Knows secret of stealing two bases at once.

2. Perfected homerun swing in Yankee Stadium.

3. Hot wife.

4. Hall of Fame Class of '16, wearing Yankee cap.

5. Career .289 against righties, .282 against lefties.

6. Needs to get away from horrible Tropicana Field.

7. Can still play OF if necessary.

8. Career .307 at Fenway.

9. Only 37.

10. He nixed that trade last year to Boston; we owe him another shot at a ring.


Kimberly Jones said...

he makes me wetter than george steinbrenner's pampers

Joe De Pastry said...

Just think a minute about how many prospects we'd have to give up for him, and how they will come back to haunt us for years. You can be sure the TB Rays of St Petersburg would demand more from us than from any other team.