Thursday, July 28, 2011

We lose to the losingest of losers

You could see this coming. Everyone could. King Felix on the mound. Hughes still reformulating.

To celebrate Hope Week, allow me to crack-up my newly enhanced pessimism machine:

Boone Logan stinks as a LOOGY. Therefore, we’ll trade prospects – including Manny Baneulos – who might someday be a LOOGY — for various parts of Ubaldo Jimenez. Not that he will do any good. Colorado is dangling him, so we must bite. It’s that simple. We cannot stop ourselves. Crack cocaine to an addict.

We’ll overpay, obviously. We’ll send Jesus Montero, Dellin Betances and Ivan Nova. And when Ubaldo gets hammered – it’s not the National League anymore, remember Denny Neagle? – the fans will boo as loudly as they can.

This is because, unlike smaller markets where nobody follows prospects, the New York crowd has watched Jesus for four years. So Ubaldo turns all those postive hopes into a 3-inning, 8-run outing, he will get booed, if not Ed Whitsoned — setting up a perfect negative feedback loop. He’ll hate New York, and New York will hate him. In two years, after countless bad outings, coupled with Montero’s success in Colorado, we will have no choice but to trade Ubaldo for whatever we can get, which won’t be much. Then he’ll turn it around and pitch decently.

(This is what losses do to me.)


Mike said...

Ubaldo Jimenez = Javy Vazquez.

Joe De Pastry said...

We desperately need a LOOGY but none of the trade rumors I read about ever mention one.
Is Cashman not watching the games?
Are the guys writing about trade rumors clueless?