Saturday, October 6, 2007

Bugged Out

It is pointless being a Yankee fan.

When we pitch, we don't hit. When we hit, we don't field or pitch. When we run, we are thrown out. When we hit and pitch, it is always against lousy teams. In the playoffs, we don't pitch and hit at the same time, ever.

We used to. We did in the last century. We don't anymore.

So, big deal, we came back after the all star break and backed into the playoffs, on the back of the Tigers' collapse.

The Tigers could probably beat Cleveland.

Now, we would lose to Tampa Bay if we were playing them.

Luckily, it is not just A-rod this time. Hideki the great "Godzilla" becomes a mini monkey. We pay Giambi $20 million per to watch. We pay Clemens $28 million ( ok, only $18 million pro-rated) , to go 8-8 and sit out September due to old age.

So now, on Sunday night, all the suits will show up at the stadium and enthusiastically cheer on the team. Dreaming visions of great Yankee comebacks in the past.

Only problem is , that Cleveland will score 3 in the first inning and that will be enough..

We'll be out of our first at bat, after 6 pitches. Against former Yankee Jake Westbrook.

If I watched the game, I would throw up on my shoes. I like about 5 guys on this Yankee team. I used to like them all.

Time to turn off this blog until we get to the next Yankee world series. We are a jynx now, because we are reporting the truth.

The party is over. Go home. Re- aquaint with your kids and wife and pets. Do it Sunday night at 6:00pm. If you have to watch TV, only watch 60 minutes.

The Mets are better off.

7 comments:

el duque said...

A little bitter, there, A-Fon?

DAMMIT. WE'RE YANKEE FANS, AND WE WON'T QUIT.

THE TEAM WILL QUIT.

WE WILL NEVER QUIT.

NEVER.

rap said...

I am trying to think positive. For example: If the Yanks blow it, at least I'll get more of my freelance stuff done.

Anonymous said...

No, then Yanks will win Game 4. Despite an 0-fer-5 from A-Bomb, the Yanks will find a way to win.

Why?

To put the season where some people always knew it would end up.

In the shaking, sweaty hands of Mike Mussina.



BBB

Mustang said...

el duque:

Yankee fans didn't quit in '01.
Yankee fans didn't quit in '02.
Yankee fans didn't quit in '03.
Yankee fans didn't quit in '04.
Yankee fans didn't quit in '05.
Yankee fans didn't quit in '06.

Maybe it's time Yankee fans quit.

rockin' rich:

Yankees get paid for not performing. Freelancers don't. If I were you, I wouldn't give this team five seconds of billable time.

BBB:

Your Mussina scenario has the ring of authentic prophecy, like a giant brought down by a storm of insects.

Mustang said...

I like about 5 guys on this Yankee team. I used to like them all.
-- Alphonso


Who are the five? I can't think of five. I'd like to know.

el duque said...

Dammit. They still have to beat us in OUR CRIB.

They can't beat us in Yankee Stadium. You know why?

BECAUSE THEY WON'T HAVE THEIR INSECT FRIENDS.

We'll win two at home, then beat them in Cleveland.

Take it to the bank.

Anonymous said...

SuperF...

Here are the 5 I like:

Joba
Phil
Ian
Joba
Joba

And maybe Shelley.

Fonzy