Saturday, June 27, 2009

Time to take nominations for June Yankee Employee of the Month

You know the drill. And most of you probably know The Yankee Employee of the Month Curse.

The May 2009 vote shall remain forever mired in controversy, due to election tampering by SuperFrankenstein and the aptly named Whitey Fraud.

As a result, John Sterling won a disputed (and asterisked) election. And everyone paid the price.

Almost immediately, the Voice of the Yankees suffered one of the crowning gaffes of his career -- the A-bomb from Hideki Matsui. Moreover, as was prophesized, the entire team went into the pits, dropping from first place to four games behind Boston.

We must not let superstition outrank our love of purely rational thought.

At the same time, we should not venture blindly into alternative planes of karma, where the lurking primal forces of evil might not welcome us.

I say this:

Let's hold a Yankee Employee of the Month election without fear or regard for whatever gods out there have a boner against us.

Let's build something togethahhhh.

It starts with nominees...

10 comments:

I'm Bill White said...

I vote for Lex-Guez.

Anonymous said...

Brett Tomko

Wondercat said...

My dilemma with the curse is we really don't know its true effects at this point. Is it an anti-Yankees curse or an anti-player of the month curse. I initially planed on nominating Youkilis and hope his beard catches on fire, but what if the curse is entirely Yankee based. Youk could go on a absolute tear, beard fully intact, putting the division out of reach. I think we need more research before we really do some damage here. Therefore, I propose Luis Castillo. The worst that can happen is he turns into a power-hitting Ozzie Smith and dominates the NL, at a safe distance from the Yankeeverse. He will provide a safe test subject that we can study. In order to destroy something, you must first understand it.

She-Fan said...

Can we vote for Jose Veras even though he's in Cleveland? Or Angel Berroa even though he's in....?

BJ said...

Suzyn

Mustang said...

I vote we change the name of the award to Chevrolet Yankee Of The Month.

Whitey Fraud said...

This slander shall not stand.

I know that the principles (and principals) of democracy are beyond your grasp, Dick, since you have lived all your pathetic life in the third world county.

Simply electioneering and expressing an opinion is not considered tampering in the FREE WORLD, you moron.

In fact, it's the patriotic duty of every denizen of the Yankeeverse to support the candidate of their choice. Sleazy weasels, malcontents, Canadians and known thespians such as yourself may bristle under the heels of living democracy but the rest of us know where it's at, you tampering tampon!

Clearly, you've been filching (and felching) Alpo's meds and are in a precarious mental state, so seek help amid the rural meth clinics and other public facilities available to your kind pronto, Tonto.

As for Superfluous Frankincense, I'm sure he can speak for himself, or hire some English guy to do so.

Govern yourself accordingly. And often, numb nuts.

Vote for Nady. X marks the spot!

Mike said...

How about Yankee of the day? We can minimize casualties.

Mustang said...

No player exemplified the Yankees in June more than AJ "Big Game" Burnett. Especially against the Red Sox.

Thank god he's gone said...

Veras. Driven out of town by Jeep.