Thursday, July 26, 2018

News Item: Gary Sanchez to Go on DL for "At Least a Month"

We brought in a Mr. Santino Corleone, well-known motivational speaker, and his assistant, a Mr. Peter Clemenza, to discuss Gary Sanchez's future with him:

GARY:  You want me to hang around?

SC:  Yeah, hang around.  You all right?

GARY:  Yeah, I'm fine.  Just got this groin pull, you know.

[GARY coughs, perhaps deliberately.]

SC:  There's some food in the icebox.  You hungry or anything?

GARY:  [eyes light up]  Food?  Did you say food??

SC:  How 'bout a drink?  Have a little brandy, that'll help ease the pain.  Maybe some heat therapy, a whirlpool bath.

GARY:  All right, sure, that might be a good idea.  Especially the food.

SC:  Yeah, right.

[GARY exits]

SC:  [CLEMENZA]  I want you to take care of that son-of-a-bitch right away.  Gary sold out your team, that stronz'.  I don't want to see him again.  Cincinnati, San Diego, Kansas City:  I don't care.  Make that first thing on your list, understand?

PC:  Oh, Gary, you won't see him around here no more.






10 comments:

Local Bargain Jerk said...


Brilliant!

13bit said...

We can only dream.

Publius said...

International League Hall Of Famer Brian Cashman does it again. Sanchez will be back just in time for RailRiders playoff push. Scranton is ecsatic.

KD said...

I thought that Boone would do something to show us that he realizes Fat Sancho is a huge problem for the team. And by doing something, Boone would show us that he deserves to manage the New York Yankees.

Boone did nothing. Boone said nothing. The Yankees gave Fat Sancho an "out" by placing him on the DL. as if fans are fooled by this weak gesture. Fat Sancho showed absolutely no discomfort and actually ran in the ninth inning when he finally decided that running was worth the effort.

Binders was a profile in courage compared to this Boone character.

KD said...

Yankees get Happ for Drury.

Red Thunder and Sheffield SAFE!!

Local Bargain Jerk said...


The actual trade seems to be Happ for Drury and McKinney.

At first blush, I'm okay with it.

Local Bargain Jerk said...


Now...if the Mets would consider trading deGrom for Sanchez, even up...

Hey, I can dream, can't I?

HoraceClarke66 said...

You sure can, LBJ, you sure can!

Well, as with most Cashman trades: it could've been worse1

Yeah, I'd have loved to actually give McKinney a shot. And I can't help thinking that Drury could've been saved for better.

And, most odious of all, this probably mean still more Neil Walker at-bats!!!

But hey, it was better than a sharp stick in the eye, as they used to say in my neighborhood...

ranger_lp said...

I'm sure that food included an ice cream sandwich...

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