'51 Yanks solve Mariano, take 2-1 lead over '98ers in G.O.A.T. World Series

"Suzyn, this is about missed opportunities..."
Pauly's baserunning blunder...
Superchief wobbly in fifth...
Did Torre bring in Mo too early?
Gil McDougald... G.O.A.T. MVP?
Knobby's drive falls short; it's a small ball series!
Next up: Eddie Lopat v Orlando Hernandez
THE JUNKMAN V EL DUQUE

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Vegas on High Alert

Dateline;  Las Vegas, Nevada.  May 28th.  4:05 am:


WVEG ( radio ) ; So, Alphonso, what brings you to Vegas?

ALPHONSO :  I'm here to arrange payment options on my 11,000 - 1 bet ( placed during Spring Training, I might add ) that neither Phil nor Ian would have a win for the Yankees by the All Star break.

WVEG :  But it is only May.  Who is going to talk money with you at this point?

ALPHONSO :  Did you watch Ian Kennedy last night?  He gave up two 4 run leads faster than crows fly off roadkill when a semi is bearing down on them.

WVEG :  But he is one of the top Yankee pitching prospects, and baseball is a marathon, not a sprint.

ALPHONSO :  Rubbish.  This guy is a first inning specialist, and that's it.  And so far, no one in baseball has figured out how to use that kind of specialization effectively.

WVEG :  Aren't you worried that Phil Hughes will be back on track soon?

ALPHONSO :  I'm thinking of putting down another bet that Carl Pavano has a Yankee win before either of these two clowns.

WVEG:  Are you feeling more confident because Ian is now headed for the DL?

ALPHONSO :  You mean his " lat" injury?  More rubbish.  The Yankee management needs an excuse to sit this guy  down.  I've already offered to take him down with me to the South Mexico dirt field league, as I did with Edwar.  And look how he is doing now?

WVEG:  What did the Yankee brass say?

ALPHONSO:  Get lost.

WVEG:  How do you like the Yankee's decision to convert Joba to a starter in mid-season?

ALPHONSO:  He'll be with me in Mexico by August.

WVEG:  What are you going to do with all your money?

ALPHONSO:  We are thinking of adding a "Tommy John " surgical clinic to Rose's Cantina in my favorite Mexico town, so Yankee prospect pitchers can drink and re-hab in the sun.

Also, the peso is worth a lot more than the dollar.  Or fresh cactus.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Dear Jesus (and I don't mean Savior Montero),

This entry and the one before it re: Phil Hughes' blog are two reasons why this is the funniest Yankees blog on the net.

Congrats on viewer 100,000, I wish it could have been me.

Good luck, god speed and keep up the good work,

-Shamus-

michael kei said...

Crows flying off of roadkill as a semi bears down on them? Interesting analogy... Did you see that first hand with Edwar while sitting up against a palm tree?

Alphonso said...

Michael,

There are no roads in south Mexico where a semi can roll.

I saw it on 81 near Cortland.