Saturday, May 22, 2010

Is Kevin Russo the new Mariano?

Allright you bastards, it's time for some old-fashioned, smart-ass, scientific blogging.

Is Kevin Russo the new Mariano?

Hoomph?, you ask Has el duque lost his Reeses Pieces, sitting at home and watching video of that underwater spill? No.

Listen:

Kevin Russo finished 10th in the IL last year in hitting. He was one of the three guys in the top 10 under age 25. He stole 13 bases. He hit .326. And he had no position. He played everywhere. If Tim McCarver were writing this blog, he'd say Kevin did everything but sell tickets. Mwah-mwah-mwah. (Insert gunshot here.)

If Russo was in the Kansas City Royal Jellies, he'd have played half the season in the majors, probably starting in the infield. Hell, he'd be on their match covers. Do they have team match covers?

Ramiro Pena can field. Russo can hit.

OK -- in this 3D era (DH, that is: Thames, Jorge, Swish, the former Nick Johnson), these two guys are our bench.

And here is the evolution of our universal adaptors... Jerry Hairston replaced Wilson Betemit, who replaced Miguel Cairo, who replaced Enrique Sojo, who replaced Clay Bellinger, who replaced the ultiliy infielder who began this long Yankee run: Mariano Duncan.

Before Mariano Duncan, we were an entire team of utility players. (See Velardi, Randy.)

So the question is... can we win with 3 DHs and two all-purpose socket wrenches? And do we have a replacement for Mariano?

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

We should trade Russo for to the Angels for draft picks.

David Ballela said...

http://dbellel.blogspot.com/2010/05/hey-russo.html

A rook went back to NY City
Because Winns' play was pure chicanery
Thames takes chances and Jorg got bonged
And in a minute, he's righted wrong
Hey, Russo! Russo Italiano!
Hey, Russo! Russo Italiano!
Go, go, go you mixed up Sicialiano (or Neapolitano)

All you calabraise-a hit the ball like a crazy with a
Hey, Russo!, there's no more Yogi Berra
Hey Russo, no more that Scooter fella
Hey, Russo! Russo Italiano!
Try an enchilada with da fish a bac a lab and then a
Hey goombah, I love a how you hits go boombah
But take a some advice paisano
From A-Rod, your new found bro
Get some dates with Kate
It will power every at-plate