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Monday, October 13, 2008

Big Brown's Career-Ending Injury Devastates Hank Steinbrenner's Title Hopes In Fantasy Horse Racing League

This just in.

Big Brown's horse racing career is over.

Also over is the fantasy horse racing season of Hank "Stubby" Steinbrenner.

"Big Brown was my first-round pick," a dejected Steinbrenner said. "I built my stable around him. I am so screwed."

Finding himself "at a lower place than I've been in a long time," Steinbrenner is even mulling a name-change for his team in an attempt to shake off the bad luck with a new identity and fresh start.

The current name, "Rocky River Renegades", was meant to honor of his father's place of birth in Ohio.

Steinbrenner now questions that decision.

"I really wanted a name that had something to do with Jennifer Love-Hewitt, but I couldn't think of anything good that I could use on the fantasy website without worrying that they'd kick me out of the league for being too raunchy. Cashman told me I could probably get away with 'Knockers' or 'Torpedos', but I stopped listening to him months ago."

As a public service, we here at IIH, IIF, IIc, ask our readers to submit suggestions for a new name for Stubby's fantasy horse racing team. We'll be sure to pass them along.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Luckily his jockey already has had a second job as the Red Sox second baseman.