Thursday, October 30, 2008

It's not Jeter's answers that suck, it's the questions

Bloggers are ragging over S.I.'s namby-pamby interview with Derek Jeter, mostly because the Jeet talks 20 minutes of nothing. He's a pro at saying nothing. He speaks with the mentality of Sarah Palin: Just don't say something stupid, and you might be President.

But, hey, who can be Oscar Levant with questions like these: Do you play Xbox at all? Have you watched the postseason at all? Speaking of the last week of the regular season, how was that
last game at Yankee Stadium? What do you think about the new Stadium? Do you ever come back to New York during the offseason?

Yeesh. Why didn't they just ask about carbon emission credits?

Wanna open up the Captain and see what's inside? Ask questions worthy of a captain.

Here's our interview:

IIH, IIF, IIc: Think this. Phone rings. It's Heath Ledger's assistant. She screams, "HEATH IS DEAD! THAT OLSEN TWIN KILLED HIM!" What do you do? Turn it over to the police, or look for the murderer yourself?

IIH, IIF, IIc: You see the stars of "High School Musical 3" telling kids to, "Get out the vote!" We've become Nazi Germany, am I right?

IIH, IIF, IIc: Natalie Portman? What, she's too short?

IIH, IIF, IIc: Your computer locks up, and Microsoft asks in a box if you want to send "an error message?" Do you call it an error? Or as a fielder, who knows that everybody makes errors, do you side with the computer and not call it in?

IIH, IIF, IIc: Tell us something we don't know about Brian Bruney!


Anonymous said...

If McCain picked Jeter as his VP candidate he would have a 12 point lead.

Anonymous said...

Those were the best interview questions I've ever read! Great Job.

Missing though was:

After leaving a four-day trip to Texas, you discover you've caught Crabs. Do you ask Giambi to borrow his golden thong to bust out of a slump ?

Anonymous said...

Oh my God.

This is the funniest thing I have ever seen in my life.

Too bad it was a Rays fan, and not a Red Sox fan.

Anonymous said...


When you get a chance, contact our captain to discuss something.