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Monday, April 28, 2008

Excerpt of Conversation between Roger Clemens, Mindy McCready, Monica Lewinsky and Michael Jordan

FROM THE DAILY NEWS:


During another Big Apple excursion, the two holed up in the trendy SoHo Grand and later partied with Monica Lewinsky and Michael Jordan. McCready, according to a source, even bummed a cigar off His Airness to give to Clemens.

FROM THAT ENCHANTED EVENING...

MINDY: … and so when Rocket’s jet hits the tarmac, BLOOEY, his knee flies up and breaks my nose! It's just a dang accident, fer crissakes, but there's blood everywhere. You'd think I was some crazy lady. Say, anybody got OxyContin?

ROGER: Ha. Ain’t she something? I call her my "road trip honeybee," because she buzzes my hive with her sweet nectar. Speaking of nectar, who’s low on Rocket Fuel? You, Mona?

MONICA: Could you please freshen my 7&7.

MINDY: I was in a seven-on-seven once. A coupla Dallas Cowboy linebackers. Got myself two busted ribs and a Charley Horse. Wrote a song about it, “Hit Me Again and I’ll Have Your Truck.”


MICHAEL: I remember that song. Dennis Rodman used to warm up to it, wearing full bridal dress.

MINDY: I think I dated Dennis Rodman. I lost four teeth. They used to talk about him going to the backboard. What he really did was go to the bedboard.

ROGER: Hah. Ain’t she something? You should have seen her in 10th grade. Hey, none of you are with Child Protective, right? Good. So, Mona, when you’re not Presidential interning – you know, all that secret stuff you do for national security -- you follow baseball?

MONICA: A little. My friends call me Calvin Schiraldi, because I blew the Biggest Save of My Career.

ROGER: Well, heh, you stay away from that Bill Clinton. Listen, kid, you got something special, and that creep can't carry your shoes. Yeah, you may be a little chubby, but you got a major league strike zone. Tell you what: Look me up in Houston, and I'll line you up with Jose Canseco.


MINDY: Jose Canseco? He's got himself a twin brother, right? I think I dated them once. Broke my wrist with a tire iron. Hey, about that OxyContin...

1 comment:

michael kei said...

His next kid will be named Kindy.