Tuesday, July 14, 2020

Here Comes The Obfuscation and the Blather....

Baseball is getting closer to reality than I ever imagined.

Already, Aaron Boone is dodging questions and trying to fool the opposition with innuendo and eye rolls, rather than sentences. 

1.   When asked about the health of Chapman and Cessa, for example, he just smiled. Why should he tell us if symptoms have appeared, or if these players are likely to play or when?

 Covid-19 cases will not be officially reported, as in the State Florida.   If we don't know about them, they don't exist. 

2.  Aaron Judge, on the other hand, is still testing that " neck."  It is the giraffe syndrome, I think.  Where he rotates the head and uses it as a club to win the ladies' attention. As predicted,  Judge will soon be hitting that wiffle ball off of that tee.  Putting him about 60 days from being game ready.

3.  On the positive side, according to manager Boone,: "Tanaka is doing really well." 

 He walked around the stadium yesterday day and reported seeing;  three kangaroos hopping;  an ice cream sandwich the size of a volkswagen; and a marching band of penguins.  If he covers one eye with a patch, his headache diminishes.   

He is just about ready to begin throwing sponges to increase co-ordination between his concussed 
brain and the game.  "We think he is on the same track as Red Thunder once was...it is all good, " uttered Manager Boone as he moved a proper distance from us. 

I can't wait for the Yankee front office and manager to aggressively begin issuing lies and mis-information.  "Don't ever tell the truth"...reads the new banner in the Yankee clubhouse.

It is the American way.

And it makes us all feel more at home. 

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