Wednesday, July 17, 2013

Drunk Blog Continues:

Stayed up late last night but missed the Mariano think in the All-Star game. I can't believe I missed it. I missed it because a friend came to visit, and he doesn't give a damn about baseball, and with the Yankees being bad, I capitulated. I relented. I gave in. If the Yankees were decent this year, I would have seen the Mariano moment, and now I missed it.

I saw the Zimmerman verdict moment. That's how pathetic my life has become. I was watching TV when the Zimmerman verdict came down. And now I've missed the Mariano moment./ I can't believe I missed it. My head hurts, and I'm not just talking about pain. I'm talking about deeper than pain. Worse than paid. Melancholia. Angst. Worse than either of those two, too. It's the pain of a Mariano blown save - the worst pain in the Yankiverse, worse than - well - not really worse than a Jeter injury or a death to a Yankee great such as - no, I WILL NOT SPECULATE IN SUCH MATTERS - where are we? Mo. I missed his entrance last night. I missed everything.

They named him MVP. They're trying to be nice. They know we're dying, and they know A-Rod isn't coming back, and they feel sorry for us, so they named Mo MVP. He should have refused it. He should have said, "NO, I WILL NOT ACCEPT THIS, NOT AFTER WHAT BUD SELIG AND HIS FINANCIAL POLICIES HAVE DONE TO MY TEAM AND ORGANIZATION." Chad Curtis would have done that. He would have told them to go to hell.

What made me think about Chad Curtis? The booze. That was the booze thinking. Somebody help me. It's 95 degrees and my old college roommate is screaming for more...


Alphonso said...

It is not your fault that you missed MO's final all star appearance.

They used him in the eighth to be certain he would appear in the game.

Who looks for MO in the eighth?

So you would have missed him anyway, assuming that you would have tuned in for the ninth.

How can you have friends that care nothing about baseball?

Have a drink for me!

Alibi Ike said...

I agree. Unless these "friends" were actually hookers, something is very wrong in Casa Seely.

KD said...

Good to see you have a nice "retirement" hobby: turning booze into urine. I need to get better at that myself. got any pointers?

Mariano Rivera, RHP and All-Star Game MVP said...

It's OK, Duque. Relax, buddy. This November, you come to Panama and we will surf the big ones together.

JM said...

Don't go with Mariano, Duque. He'll take you to church and do the Jesus thing on you.

You think you drink now. That'll really send you around the bend.