Thursday, July 4, 2013

Happy Birthday, Mr. Sterling, and nine other Independence Day deep thoughts

Ten deep thoughts.

1. Happy Birthday, John Sterling! Thuuuuuuuuh, Master.

2. Happy Birthday, Ghost of George Steinbrenner. Reappear and rattle some chains, demanding that your sons buck up and stand for their organization against creeping MLB corporatism.

3. Thank you, Minnesota! If the Yankees somehow make the 2013 post-season, this week shall be remembered as a turning point - and you practically did it for us.

4. Thank you again, Minnesota. In every city, Mariano has been feted, often with the $5,000 big check donation to his charity. This... this belongs in Cooperstown.

5. Hitless in four at bats, with a strikeout and a GIDP, A-Rod has clearly reached post-season form. (Badaboom.)

6. Don't give up on David Adams, Alphonso! I think he'll have a decent MLB career, in a Marco Scutero sort of way. If we accept that stars like Giambi and Granderson must endure a tough transition in NY, we must be more patient with youngsters. (Zoilo will soon hit a rough patch, too.)

7. I still can't figure out what the Yankees will do with Granderson, when we face lefthanders. Bench Wells and Zoilo? Bench Ichiro? Go with an all-lefty OF?

8. That giant OF first-round draft pick, Aaron Judge, still hasn't signed. He's holding out for big bucks. I hate it when the Yankees pull out their pockets and poormouth, but their historical record with giant-sized draft picks is so lousy that I almost don't care if he signs.

9. First base is an organizational black hole. Practically the only guy in our system who was having a breakout year - Kyle Roller, 1B in Trenton - just got hurt. Lemmie say it again: If A-Rod can hit, the Yankees should seriously consider moving him to 1B.

10. Every time Phil Hughes has a strong outing, a voice inside me yells, "Now! Trade him NOW!" I'm sure Cashman hears it, too. He's heard it before.


Rex Reed said...

11. Fire Mustang and send him to my provincetown beach house

JM said...

Nice to see Rex here, 'out of the closet', so to speak.

Incredible hit piece by Wallace Matthews on ESPN villifying A-Rod for daring to say it's been a rough year for him and his family--in large part because of the witch hunt conducted by MLB and ESPN (which Matthews references as "according to MLB, ESPN, the Miami Times and other reputable sources..."--proving he's not only a douchebag but also that it's been all MLB and ESPN, and the poor Miami Times probably picked up an ESPN story or did a summary piece, so they get trotted out, too).

The best part is, he brings in Lou Gehrig and his July 4th speech at the Stadium as contrast to what a complete and utter worthless piece of scum A-Rod is. This is known as the 'straw dog' argument.

Oh, and according to Matthews, it's A-Rod's fault that he signed such big contracts with the Yankees, and it was somehow wrong to leave Arlington, and that A-Rod took steroids after signing the first Yankee contract. My mind gets hazy with all the accusations thrown around in this piece of yellow 'journalism'--I thought A-Rod admitted to steroid use with the Rangers, and only the Rangers? Not that Matthews doesn't use all the rumors and allegations since as fact in compiling his 'reasons to hate A-Rod' list.

I never liked A-Rod, I never wanted him, I couldn't believe the Steinboys and Cashman were so completely stupid they signed him to this latest dumb contract. But like Duque, this is really getting weird. Why the hard-on here? Where's the hit piece on Ortiz and his juicing allegations? Is there some kind of closet homophobia at work here stemming from that strange kissing the mirror photoshoot? Is that it? Ortiz is not only a Red Sox, he's ugly, so the latent and highly self-frightening gayness at ESPN isn't triggered? (Hey, Rex--whaddya think? Anything to this?)

I can't figure it. Why A-Rod's lawyers can gin up a lawsuit against these shitheels is something I'll never understand. The line has been crossed as far as I'm concerned. Take them down, or use some of that quarter of a billion dollars Matthews points to and tie them up in court for years until Disney cries uncle.


JM said...

I should've said, 'like Duque, I think this is getting really weird.'

It's not that Duque is AS weird as this tarring and feathering by ESPN.

Just wanted to point that out. Though if he wants to claim weirdness, that's his right as an Amerricun.

JM said...

And it's 'why A-Rod's lawyers CAN'T gin up a lawsuit.'

This is what I get for typing in the German sun when I can't really see the screen. Sorry.

But hey, four straight against the Twinkies! Yeah, man. We still got it!

Rex Reed said...

Is that it? Ortiz is not only a Red Sox, he's ugly, so the latent and highly self-frightening gayness at ESPN isn't triggered? (Hey, Rex--whaddya think? Anything to this?)

My view:
ESPN is controlled by Red Sox Nation
lovers. So is the nytimes sports' section. both latent gay groups. Good analysis John. Hey El Duque, hire this John

KD said...

All Redsux be ugly. Youk is the prime example. and they have a midget chimp at second. funny to hang a guy for accepting money thrown at him. jeez. i'm not worth my salary either. should I give some back? fat chance!

Hey, John M! They have sun in Germany? Not when I've been there. Damn gloomy place. no wonder the Krauts have Wanderlust.