Wednesday, July 24, 2013

Today's A-Rod News

The most wanted criminal in baseball is not really hurt.


RUMOR UPDATE:


8 comments:

KD said...

These Steinspawn are such douchebags that I actually feel sorry for A-Rod. Do we need help at 3rd, or don't we? That is the issue that should concern the Steinspawn. Not how to get out of daddy's bad contract.

joe de pastry said...

If he says he's ready, play him, as the DH. If he gets hurt again, he won't be the first. I can't stand A-Fraud, but this is ridiculous. Play him until he can't play anymore, because of a new injury or a suspension.

Nicolás Maduro Moros, President of Venezuela said...

The virtuous people of the glorious socialist republic of Venezuela extend the hand of friendship to Yankee thirdbaseman Alex Rodriguez and offer him political asylum. We have no extradition agreement with MLB and welcome Mr. Rodriguez to express his solidarity with the people of Venezuela and his dedication to the establishment of workers' states throughout South America. Yankee replacements, on PEDs or not, break the shackles of the Steinbrenners and join the dictatorship of the Proletariat! You have nothing to lose but your chains and your bus passes to Scranton.

KD said...

Does that rumor report mean what I think it means? that the Yank FO is being called on the carpet by another MLB team for the crap they're pulling with A-Rod (false medical reports)? fucking unbelievable! (If true, of course.) Duque picked a fine time for a rehab stint!!

Stang said...

KD, that rumor does seem to mean what you think. Additional rumor: the other team is the Red Sox!

Larry Lucchino, President / Chief Executive Officer, Boston Red Sox said...

The Boston Red Sox have requested that Major League Baseball investigate malfeasance by the New York Yankees' front office but also the involvement of the blog you are reading now. As suspensions and indictments became imminent, the moderator of your blog, one "El Duque" went on a bender, as they say, and then skipped town. The Boston Red Sox organization has long suspected a connection between IIHIIFIIC and the Biogenesis clinic in Miami. To be specific, IIHIIFIIC bloggers are suspected not only of peddling PEDs to Yankee players but also taco dogs, cases of Crown Royal, books about somebody named "Juju", autographed photos of John Sterling, and a certain Suzyn Waldman-Jayson Nix sex tape. Don't sleep too easily tonight, readers. As we speak, the FBI is closing in on El Duque's hideout.

a helpful fan said...

John, I'm really worried about Yankee financial stability. The owners spend so much money. How can their families possibly get by?

Has the team ever considered purchasing their own MRI machine? Bet Hal and Hank could save a lot of money if they just went out in bought a used one and installed it beneath the Stadium. Maybe get one from one of those hospitals closing in Brooklyn.

If Hal and Hank had their own MRI, they, quite naturally, would have their own minimum wage technician. Know what I mean, John? Save money on the tests PLUS easy trip to the DL when the situation... a-hem... calls for it.

John Sterling said...

Yes, and if the player's MRI comes out positive, he can be driven by Jeep to the Hebrew Home, which is more like a college campus than a hospital.