Saturday, April 6, 2013

One more injury and Youkilis plays shortstop

I don't want to be negative. I really don't. But when the tire blows, the spare is missing, the cell phone doesn't work, and as you walk the dark and deserted road, it starts to sleet - well - don't you just want to - I don't know - do something crazy... like play Youkilis at shortstop?

Yeah, that's right. It's as if you're telling God: "Screw you, Old Man! I'm not afraid anymore! What more can you do to me? Hell with this! You go Yahweh, and I'll go mine!"

Youk at short. That's today's backup plan. A divine comedy, is it not? 

If Jason Nix goes down - as we know he will - Cervelli will move to 3B, which he played in some mixed office softball league - and Youk will take over at SS. I am not making this up. That's Girardi's plan. The Yankees - the Walking Dead - are so handcuffed with injured players, disappointing prospects and - well - scrap heap acquisitions that we'll never play but still don't want to lose - (I'm talking about you, Thomas Neal) - that we have to survive until Eduardo Nunez's bone bruise heals with a bench as thin as a coat of Windex.  And if that means playing catchers in the infield, so be it.

Nuni is listed as "day-to-day." Translated from Yankee language, that usually means a week.

It's comical. It's a Benny Hill sketch. It's North Korea, without the nukes. I'd yell, "What else can go wrong?" but we all know what kind of juju that conjures.

Insert sigh here.

Yesterday, listening to John and Suzyn talk about the Tigers lineup was like hearing a toad describe a bullfrog: You could not help but hear the envy in their voices. At one point, John was going through the first five batters in the Detroit order, and you would have thought he was describing the 1927 Yankees. ("That Austin Jackson, he just keeps getting better and better.") Unspoken - but quite apparent - was the notion that we don't even belong on the same field.

And soon Youkilis will be playing short.

A couple more tweaks, and who knows? Mariano playing left? Don't laugh. We'll need an OF far more than a closer.


SanJoseKid said...

May I reiterate an idea expressed this last winter? Empty out the bullpen and let those pitchers play positions. Then, take whatever infielders and outfielders are left (in other words, uninjured) and let them be relievers. And yes, Mariano COULD play left field. Remember that when Elston Howard replaced Yogi behind the plate (in those years when the DH was unheard of), Yogi played left field. And he played it well. I have an editorial pasted in my scrapbook from a sportswriter who marvelled that Yogi had become a decent defensive outfielder. And let's go a step further. A coach should DH. Yep. Kevin Long, time to practice what you preach. These moves would make baseball history as well as fill the Stadium stands. Who wouldn't want to watch Mariano in the OF, Joba at 3B, and David Robertson behind the plate? Most intriguing of all, Youkilis could knock down batters, a sudden reversal of fortune. Imagine, Kevin Youkilis drills Dustin Pedroia in the ninth, who in turn charges the mound. In the ensuing melee, Alfredo Aceves forgets what team he is on, goes berserk and starts punching everybody. Like the Great One says, he's a stormy guy. A cosmic marvel, no?

el duque said...

San Jose,

If John ever gets to manage - as we hope he will - you should be his bench coach.