Thursday, April 25, 2013

A Few Comments About Our Number Two Prospect

I saw the Mason Williams story come across the wires while I was having a manhattan ( actually, I always have at least three ) and ranting about why the Yankees cannot score, and how long I will have to starve myself until our next run crosses the plate.

So I did a little reflecting:

1.  There is a reason we refer to Mason Williams as our " number two " prospect.  This DUI act
 is " number two" all the way.  I would have felt better if he had actually been successful driving his car up the steps into "Mary Catherine The Redeemer" church.

2.  I like drinking as well as the next guy ( actually, more ), but I never drink and drive.  I either stay where I am or, if my driver is nearby with the Escalade SUV, I'll let her take me home.

3.  Mason Williams was once considered, " a five tool " prospect.  Let's take a closer look:

A.  One of his tools ( his brain ) is apparently an anvil.  So he is now a four tool prospect.

B.  At 129 pounds, while fully drenched in his uniform, carrying a bat, glove and ball, and wearing spikes, Mason has no power.  He hasn't hit a home run since high school.  So I give him 3 tools, at best.

C.  Although, at .271 in "A" ball at Tampa, one wonders if he can he really hit?  One 0-4 day and I'll bet he is hitting .235.

D.  He maybe can throw and run.  This kid is a dumb, two tool player.

Quick, let's draw up a $100 million contract.

Luckily, the Yankees cleared me to have food again.


KD said...

Bourbon has calories, you know.

el duque said...

This is some powerful reverse juju you're practicing. Be careful with that stuff.

Masonry Heaters RHP, future Cy Young Award Winner said...

Alphonso, you're scouting the wrong prospect. Check me out. I can scuff a baseball like a skilled surgeon. Slick up that Gaylord Perry vaseline like a $10 hooker, and I am not afraid to throw hard, up and in. Actually, I like knockin' a batter down. You're not going to need Mason Williams because you won't need hitters. You don't have hitters. I don't allow many runs at all. Call me, at Single A ball, where I play for the Redkey Road Kill, in Jay County, Indiana. 1-800-HEATERS.